Originally Posted by leelandrover
Why is his dad like this and is there anything i can do to help?
1. Why is his dad like this? This can only be answered with a great depth of knowledge of your bf's dad. We cannot begin to offer why he is like this. Dozens of possible reasons and every one of them would be entirely speculation. Some might be able to give you anecdotal examples of their own similar circumstances. But none could be well applied to a person we do not know.
2. Is there anything you can do. You can be a support to your bf, but you cannot make a difference in a relationship between son and father as an outsider. Wish there was, but there isn't.
I know you feel for your bf. That is noble. But to do something about it is like asking how you can make a drunk stop drinking. You just can't. He and his father are in complete control of the outcome of their relationship. Not likely an outside influence with do much to change things between them.
Maybe a different outlook on your bf part is the best approach to take.