I have read many posts about the differences between men and woman.It seems to have the same theme.A woman will go for the excitement:"bad guys",one niters,flings with friends and co-workers,i know it can be called "expirementing".
Then they settle down with a man whose reliable and commited,but many women use words to describe their new way of life as "boring but steady".
Isn"t that settling for someone to take care of you and be a provider for you?
what"s so bad about being commited and family oriented?I think it sells the family man short.
Isn"t that settling for someone to take care of you and be a provider for you?
Well this isn't back in 1940 when man took care of and provided for woman. This is 2004 where both people are working and providing for each other. This is a team work effort today.. You should see me old post" Man vs. Women & Women vs Man.( I will bump the post)
Quote:
Originally Posted by realguy
what"s so bad about being commited and family oriented?I think it sells the family man short.
I am that type of guy that wants to be the perfect father and family guy. I go out of the way for my GF for anything she may want or need and I will do the same for my kids.
Some women settle. Some men settle. Some men and women are clear headed, thoughtful, and purposeful when they make their final selection, and as such, feel much less like they are "settling".
It is not a women thing. How about all the guys that "settle" for a girl like dear old mother only to begin looking for that woman in red on the side. Settling comes from not living up to your own standards and both sexes do this with great frequency.
Some women settle. Some men settle. Some men and women are clear headed, thoughtful, and purposeful when they make their final selection, and as such, feel much less like they are "settling".
It is not a women thing. How about all the guys that "settle" for a girl like dear old mother only to begin looking for that woman in red on the side. Settling comes from not living up to your own standards and both sexes do this with great frequency.
Some women settle. Some men settle. Some men and women are clear headed, thoughtful, and purposeful when they make their final selection, and as such, feel much less like they are "settling".
It is not a women thing. How about all the guys that "settle" for a girl like dear old mother only to begin looking for that woman in red on the side. Settling comes from not living up to your own standards and both sexes do this with great frequency.
so, stop picking on us woman - it's not just us who choose bad relationships MEN do too and they WHINE too and since I'm on the subject -
MEN, PMS too but just don't want to admit to it - It's called Denial!
I for one DIDNT settle, but everyone around me has suggested that I have. Needless to say, since getting married, I dont associate much with people who say that, its insulting to my husband! The "bad boy" I dated for years was tall and very good looking, but his personality was crap and he was going nowhere fast. Its funny though, everyone thought he was so hot and would acknowledge he was a loser but figured if he was so good looking, it was allright. My husband is slightly shorter than me, but I think hes cute! Im sick of people saying I settled for a man who is educated, successful, and has his head on straight. Im sick of people insinuating I could have done better, and that we are "mismatched". They must mean physically, because when I met him I was a single mom with half of a college degree and a less-than-perfect past. So now tell me, who settled???lol
I for one DIDNT settle, but everyone around me has suggested that I have. Needless to say, since getting married, I dont associate much with people who say that, its insulting to my husband! The "bad boy" I dated for years was tall and very good looking, but his personality was crap and he was going nowhere fast. Its funny though, everyone thought he was so hot and would acknowledge he was a loser but figured if he was so good looking, it was allright. My husband is slightly shorter than me, but I think hes cute! Im sick of people saying I settled for a man who is educated, successful, and has his head on straight. Im sick of people insinuating I could have done better, and that we are "mismatched". They must mean physically, because when I met him I was a single mom with half of a college degree and a less-than-perfect past. So now tell me, who settled???lol
You don't sound like you settled at all. Good for you Annebash, you can tell your friends who settled, when you are old with your husband talking about great books you have read, and your friends are with there Great looking guy, trying to teach them how to play "go fish" or "war". People start to look pretty similiar when they get old. Grow old with someone that you really like.
Thanks Excaliburgrl, and I was worried about that joke too. But it is true, I want to find someone that I find attractive, but that is secondary to being able to hold a good conversation, or better yet, an exhilarating argument, and the even better makeup time.
these women that settle for attractive guys with no wits don't realize that looks can fade with age...not saying that there arent attractive old people out there...but somehow i just can't picture a guy with sideburns and leather jacket sitting in a rocking chair...
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'to really live you must nearly die'-received from a vietnam vet
these women that settle for attractive guys with no wits don't realize that looks can fade with age...not saying that there arent attractive old people out there...but somehow i just can't picture a guy with sideburns and leather jacket sitting in a rocking chair...
Ha, ha....that's why most of those dudes have to die young before their image gets tarnished. It does get pathetic with age, just think about Elvis's last days.. poor fellow.
That is true, but it went both ways. He used her for her looks and she used him for his money. It was a fair deal. And no I will not imagine having sleepy time with a 90 year old man.
Allright, I won't insist on you imagining it. It would be a rather gruesome image...Btw, this conversation reminds me of the movie "Best in Show." THere is this attractive, voluptous woman married to an old geezer like Anna Nicole's late husband, and they're being interviewed for a dog show (i'm not gonna explain, just rent the movie). He sits in his chair motionless, pretty much catatonic, and she does all the talking. She says "We have a wonderful marriage. we have SO much in common....We can sit together and talk...or not talk...we both like soup."
I have enjoyed reading all of these posts! I completely agree that looks are secondary to attraction. They do, of course, play a role, but the role, for me, is lessening. I used to look for the "hot" guys and very phsically attractive guys. At 24 (which I know is still young ), I am much more attracted to men who are intelligent, caring, supportive, and really know how to treat me well, despite what they may look like. Don't get me wrong...I still like tall, muscular men preferably with facial hair, but this is no longer a requirement. Right now, I am seeing a man who is tall, slightly overweight, and has a dog tattoo on his forearm. I must also add that he is Bipolar. Have I settled?? My answer is a strong, resounding, "No!" I feel wonderful when I'm with him, and truly care about him. When I'm feeling down or sad, he is the one that I want to go to for comfort...and I know he feels the same way about me. In fact, last night, he cried in my arms. He has been experiencing some depression lately, and he finally confided this to me last night. I feel that there is a connection between us that I have never felt before in other relationships that I have been in. It's absolutely wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for all the traditional "good looks" in the world. Did I mention that he has beautiful grayish-blue eyes, and his smile lights me up inside
Colleen
Last edited by Musical_Muse; 06-04-2004 at 11:34 AM.
"Right now, I am seeing a man who is tall, overweight, and has a dog tattoo on his forearm"
Maybe you should edit the post a little before you show him.. What if he thinks he is the "hot" guy you have been looking for. Maybe he doesn't want to know what you would prefer in a guys looks. Just a thought, but its great to see a good relationship, we forget that there are good ones out there. Congrats.
Right now, I am seeing a man who is tall, overweight, and has a dog tattoo on his forearm.
Colleen
Hmmm, just curious: what kind of dog? I hope it's not a chihuaua. Vicious dogs would be preferable for this purpose, though I'm not much into tattoos in general. But seriously, I am happy for you that you gave this great guy a chance. Hope things work out between you two.
), I am much more attracted to men who are intelligent, caring, supportive, and really know how to treat me well, despite what they may look like. Don't get me wrong...I still like tall, muscular men preferably with facial hair, but this is no longer a requirement. Right now, I am seeing a man who is tall, slightly overweight, and has a dog tattoo on his forearm. I must also add that he is Bipolar. Have I settled?? My answer is a strong, resounding, "No!" I feel wonderful when I'm with him, and truly care about him. When I'm feeling down or sad, he is the one that I want to go to for comfort...and I know he feels the same way about me. In fact, last night, he cried in my arms. He has been experiencing some depression lately, and he finally confided this to me last night. I feel that there is a connection between us that I have never felt before in other relationships that I have been in. It's absolutely wonderful, and I wouldn't trade it for all the traditional "good looks" in the world. Did I mention that he has beautiful grayish-blue eyes, and his smile lights me up inside 
