First I would suggest mediation as the first step. If you are both amicable a mediator can help you to come to a solution that will fit your needs. Lawyers can make it uglier than need be- with mediation and 1 attorney- you can pretty much write up your own agreement and pay one attorney to file it for you with the court system.
There are many web sites- but we are not allowed to list them here. Check with your local county- they will be able to refer you. FYI- in most cases where children are involved- they will order you to mediation first anyway.
Sorry to hear about your situation- maybe it will work out, have you tried counseling?
Lawyers can be ugly but I think the biggest fight is over splitting everything and who will get the children. My sis was lucky on her divorce because it never made it to court. The lawyers were able to seperate everything and make both parties happy with the outcome. She just wanted out of the marriage but got what she wanted at the same time. It may not happen all the time but is you want to go on without a fight or using more money just fight over what important to you like the kinds and then you can rebuild from there.