It appears you have not yet Signed Up with our community. To Sign Up for free, please click here....



Relationship Health Message Board
Post New Thread   Closed Thread
LinkBack Thread Tools
Old 12-05-2004, 03:52 PM   #1
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Central of USA
Posts: 132
dd annie HB User
What ways can you respark the marriage life?

What ways can you respark the marriage life? We just celebrated our 4 year wedding anniversary. We love each other dearly but the spark has kind of gone down. What are some ways we as a couple can bring the sparks back?
Annie

 
Old 12-05-2004, 05:45 PM   #2
Senior Veteran
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: U.S.A
Posts: 718
Chrissi HB User
Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

hi there, i know what you mean.
my hubby and i were married on July 18, 04
i know we are newly weds but we have actually been together almost 3 years now. (and the bulk of that time we have been living together)
we have a 14 month old daughter and i am 15 weeks pregnant.
we too have a hard time with finding the spark.

one thing we have agreed on is sex, at least once a week no matter what. it puts him in a better mood and he is nicer to me all week, and i actually end up getting into it....LOL

i know it is so hard, especially if you have children to connect, but another thing we try to do is talk, about anything, everything. the other day he actually told me he enjoys listening to me. lol
we sit and talk to eachother when he gets home from work, we lay in bed and talk before we fall asleep...

and we play games together when we can, watch movies, tv shows.
we also go out to eat with our daughter once a week, we usually cant aford it, but we do it anyway. usually it isnt anything fancy, bob evans, or chinese food.....just another way to connect.

i think after being with a person for some time you kind of have to change your expectations.

you may not feel your heart leap when you kiss anymore, and thats okay because now you can sit and talk and not worry about what they think of you, instead of all the excitment you have comfort, true friendship.
__________________
Married:7-18-2004
DD Born:10-13-2003
DS Born: 5-04-2005

 
Sponsors Lightbulb
   
Old 12-06-2004, 05:39 AM   #3
Inactive
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: ma
Posts: 9,639
eightball61 HB User
Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

Chrissi Congrats on your pregnancy


There are many ways to get things going and as Chrissi stated you can do thing if children are envovled. I see this as a common things once couples get settled into a relationship or into each other. A few other ways is that you can go on a get away weekend, plan a special night/nights in the week where you both tend to each other, walks, massages, cuddling, ect. Even the little things can get things going again. You both maybe should talk about this and get your minds together to see what may work.

 
Old 12-06-2004, 05:47 AM   #4
Inactive
(female)
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: New York
Posts: 5,813
goody2shuz HB Usergoody2shuz HB User
Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by hbannie
What ways can you respark the marriage life? We just celebrated our 4 year wedding anniversary. We love each other dearly but the spark has kind of gone down. What are some ways we as a couple can bring the sparks back?
Annie
Hey, Annie This is a great question and I am sure many will come up with an abundance of ways to ignite that spark in your relationship. My advice is to not pressure yourselves into feeling as if you must measure your love in terms of what it use to be. Many people get stuck in that way of thinking not realizing that their love is changing on a daily basis...and so long as two people remain commited to one another they will bring that spark to one another. How...by waking up each morning & asking yourself...what can I do today to show my partner that I love him/her???? It may be something as simple as leaving a note by the coffee maker, calling him and telling him you were just thinking of him and can't wait until he walks through the door, or arranging for a friend to take the kids so you two can have a romantic date. Sometimes it may be a getaway weekend away from the ordinary that will do it. It will vary but so long as two people are commited and wanting to do the things that allow you to be intimate with one another...the rest shoul follow naturally. Don't do as my husband and I did and allow life and time to take you away from the intimacy that is so vital in a relationship...it did happen but thank goodness with the help we received here we have been able to reclaim it and continue to work on rebuilding the intimacy in our relationship....hope this helps and like I said, you will not be lacking in response to this one...Goody

 
Old 12-06-2004, 10:43 AM   #5
Senior Member
(female)
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Central of USA
Posts: 132
dd annie HB User
Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

Thank you all for the responses. Your ideas and suggestions are wonderful. My husband and I work from home, and we spend just about every single waking moment together. I send him little e-mails, and we have started a date night, what we did was wrote down some date ideas and put them in a jar. We will take turns on drawing from the jar and we must do what is on the paper. It is inexpensive dates so we do not have the excuse of can't afford it. We tried it Saturday and enjoyed it. Maybe the problem is we have gotten so comfortable with each other that we no longer feel we need to do for each other what we did when we were dating. It's a comforting feeling knowing that my husband knows all my little quirks and still loves me anyways, I know all of his and I know what makes him angry and what doesn't. It's an easy relationship to keep up with, other than it's gotten kind of boring.

Annie

 
Old 12-06-2004, 10:49 AM   #6
Inactive
 
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: ma
Posts: 9,639
eightball61 HB User
Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by hbannie
Maybe the problem is we have gotten so comfortable with each other that we no longer feel we need to do for each other what we did when we were dating. .


Thats it...The jar idea is a good one and you both should keep doing that. If you don't have the money to go out on a date night then you can do something at home where just a night to spend time together close like a movie, bubble bath, massages, or even cuddling. I am glad to see Saturday night went well.

Last edited by eightball61; 12-06-2004 at 10:49 AM.

 
Old 12-13-2004, 09:20 AM   #7
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 117
Flood84 HB User
Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

Quote:
Originally Posted by hbannie
What ways can you respark the marriage life? We just celebrated our 4 year wedding anniversary. We love each other dearly but the spark has kind of gone down. What are some ways we as a couple can bring the sparks back?
Annie
Go out on a date. This is a simple and somewhat obvious suggestion, but it's amazing how many husbands would rather sit home and watch football and then wonder why they aren't getting much action in the bedroom. My wife loves it when just the two of us go out to dinner and have time to ourselves.

 
Old 02-25-2005, 10:37 PM   #8
Inactive
(female)
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 156
juicylicious HB User
Lightbulb Re: What ways can you respark the marriage life?

Always sleep naked!

 
Closed Thread

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Board Replies Last Post
my daughter in law walked out on my grandchildren for drugs..what to do? dolejaly Relationship Health 14 11-22-2009 09:37 AM
how to respark a relationship mrpacman7 Relationship Health 3 06-12-2009 02:21 PM
Post-Colon Resection - What to expect? resection Bowel Disorders 162 01-26-2008 08:21 AM
pregnant..now what?? user555 Pregnancy-Teen 21 12-23-2006 12:24 AM
This Friend Knows What She Needs to Do.... goody2shuz Relationship Health 297 07-06-2005 05:22 AM




Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off




Join Our Newsletter

Stay healthy through tips curated by our health experts.

Whoops,

There was a problem adding your email Try again

Thank You

Your email has been added








TOP THANKED CONTRIBUTORS



Kszan (272), rosequartz (255), pendulum (172), Larrylou'smom (164), Seraph (155), cryingforever (132), CadenceA (131), lenvegas (97), writeleft (83), Ely4 (62)

Site Wide Totals

teteri66 (1180), MSJayhawk (1004), Apollo123 (904), Titchou (847), janewhite1 (823), Gabriel (759), ladybud (754), midwest1 (668), sammy64 (668), BlueSkies14 (610)



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:18 PM.



Site owned and operated by HealthBoards.comô
Terms of Use © 1998-2014 HealthBoards.comô All rights reserved.
Do not copy or redistribute in any form!