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Old 03-21-2005, 12:21 AM   #1
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Unhappy How to tell if wife is messing around

We have been married for 18 years mostly ok at best. A few years back I had to go on 3rd shift. She did not like this at all! Lately she been acting to NICE.
When I come home in the morning, sometimes there are tire tracks in the driveway going up to the house. These are not from her car. What was strange, the other morning my pellow smelled like smoke. Can someone tell me any more signs to look for, to tell if she fooling around. And what do I do now.
Thanks
3rd Shift

 
Old 03-21-2005, 12:36 AM   #2
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3rd Shift
We have been married for 18 years mostly ok at best. A few years back I had to go on 3rd shift. She did not like this at all! Lately she been acting to NICE.
When I come home in the morning, sometimes there are tire tracks in the driveway going up to the house. These are not from her car. What was strange, the other morning my pellow smelled like smoke. Can someone tell me any more signs to look for, to tell if she fooling around. And what do I do now.
Thanks
3rd Shift
gee...still up and seem to post on everything!

A woman would hit redial on all of the phones. And go thru caller ID
Take half day vacations and go home at odd times (various days)
cell phone? recent calls...dialed and taken-when you get numbers you don't know you can go on line and do a reverse search for free
Pillow? Place a fine layer of powder (baby powder is fine) on it and see what happens to it. Doesn't work if she uses all pillows.
Really bad? Had a friend that placed a video recorder under the bed that had a new tape...7 hours. No picture, but lots of sound. Every night for a week. It wasn't pretty.

You can also ask her.

 
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Old 03-21-2005, 03:02 AM   #3
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Buy yourself some keylogger programs and put them on your computer, if you have a cellphone check the bill, get your wife to take a lie detector test.

 
Old 03-21-2005, 06:35 AM   #4
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Ask her!....... Then trust your instincts.

 
Old 03-21-2005, 07:49 AM   #5
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Quote:
Originally Posted by 3rd Shift
1. Lately she been acting to NICE.
2. ...sometimes there are tire tracks in the driveway going up to the house. These are not from her car.
3. ...the other morning my pellow smelled like smoke.
These are more significant signs than most have when they are suspicious. The above suggestions are excellent. I would try some of these to get a little more hard evidence before asking her as she will undoubtedly deny and the more evidence you have the better.

 
Old 03-21-2005, 08:15 AM   #6
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Hello 3rd Shift, i'm very sorry you're going through these suspicions. It's a terrible feeling.
When I had "gut feelings" my wife was cheating on me, I asked her. I still wasn't satisfied with her answer. You can buy a telephone voice recorder from any RadioShack... just plug it into a phone socket and it'll record whenever the reciever's picked up. However, if you have a dial up modem, it'll record that annoying static while someone's online. Or, if you already have a tape recorder with VOX(voice activated recording), RadioShack sells a cord you plug into the mic on the recorder, then plug the phone plug into the phone jack. This, unfortunately, worked very well for me and I found my suspicions were correct.
Definetly cell phone bills are a big one... they're evil if you ask me(had bad luck with 'em twice).
computer software is supposed to be good.
Or you can always do it the old fashioned way. Come home early from work. Good luck.

 
Old 03-21-2005, 09:26 AM   #7
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Hi,
I don't think I would ask her...you know what her answer would probably be! thats to obvious!
and asking bout the trie tracks she could come up with a good excuse for that..."oh some car just was turning around in the drive" ect,, ect,,, or about the smoke on the pillow?...she had a phone repair men out or some service guy cable ect,,ect,, he had ask if she minds that he smoke...ect ect...there all kinds of excuses!!......I think if you think that she is cheating on you your going to have to say nothing to anyone about it and just start your own investgation...try to come home on your lunch hour or on the night you suspect? take off work sick or something...then go sneeking round your own house? you may be suprise as to what you find.
Do you have a good trusting neihbor that you can trust?
That some times is the best way! but to me the best way is try to catch her in the act...that way there's no way out! unless you forgive her and place your trust back in her?
Good Luck Man.

 
Old 03-21-2005, 10:21 AM   #8
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

DO NOT ASK HER!
becoz if u did then she'd watch out every move and be more careful... all u have to do is simply take 2 day off the work without telling her.. and spy!! its the best thing! lie detectors and stuff arent really practical! i hope ur just imagining! good luck and lets know whats up with u
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Lead.. Follow.. or get OUT of the way!

 
Old 03-21-2005, 10:37 AM   #9
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

No don't ask her... you already have valueable evidence. Take action--the radio shack voice activated recorder is 45.00 its a proven and worth it. Then after you get the goods, take off work and confront them both--maybe he's married, and you can share the tape with his wife. But it does sound like she's fooling around.

 
Old 03-21-2005, 11:36 AM   #10
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Good advice from other posters....I wouldn't ask her either..
But start spying...

Does your wife smoke? Change "your" pillow case but don't let her know.
Check your trash cans too...

If you can't take the time off from work, have a trusted friend do some drive bys the house, if there is a car there take down the license plate.

I have done drive bys for girlfriends checking on their boyfriends for cheating even followed one boyfriend into a bar to meet another woman - 9 out of 10 these boyfriends were cheaters.....Helps to have a trusted friend to help investagate.

 
Old 04-03-2005, 06:52 PM   #11
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Shift, how are things going? I hope your wife wasn't cheating after all. Let us know what had happened

 
Old 04-03-2005, 09:48 PM   #12
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Try being lovable and affectionate with your wife, try to kiss her. If she pulls away, that could be a sign. Also when you hug her, does she smell different--mens cologne? Etc. Also I think the idea of a good friend of yours showing up at the house is a good one--have a friend show up unexpected.

 
Old 04-04-2005, 06:58 AM   #13
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

How sad is this post? After 18 yrs of marriage you need to "spy" on your own wife? Sad,,,,very sad.
I personally would come right out and lay it on the line.

 
Old 04-04-2005, 08:19 AM   #14
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Music4All HB User
Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

Quote:
Originally Posted by susieq0726
How sad is this post? After 18 yrs of marriage you need to "spy" on your own wife? Sad,,,,very sad.
I personally would come right out and lay it on the line.
It is indeed sad. However, if in fact she has been cheating, you have to take a strategy that will not allow her to further complicate matters through more lies.

It is wise to have hard evidence to avoid her ability to manipulate the situation further. Laying it on the line is excellent advise, so long as one has irefutable facts to lay on the line.

 
Old 04-04-2005, 02:53 PM   #15
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Re: How to tell if wife is messing around

You must be insane to come out and say it on the line, she would try covering her bases and make sure he doesn't ever find out. And if he is suspcious of his wife cheating, he should spy on her. I know I would if I had a wife and I feel she might be cheating.

Last edited by ripod; 04-04-2005 at 02:54 PM.

 
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