| Re: Emotional Turmoil????
I dunno how seriously you'd take a 21 yr old with this, but I've been in an LDR for a while, so maybe I can help.
Sex lasts about 15 minutes to a few hours...and builds up with an orgasm, and crashes down afterwards, waiting to be built up again.
Love takes time to build, but it's stronger and even when it falls, it usually doesn't fall away completely, waiting to be built up again from scratch.
So now you're thinking "what the heck is this girl talking about?"
First, a Long Distance Relationship is not for everyone. And to be honest, I have been attracted to other people over the years. But not once have I ever acted on it. You can imagine how my peers feasted on that little tidbit of my behavior when I was younger...let's not go there.
But the lack of physical contact with someone you love so much does get draining at times. And intimacy IS important. It's paramount, particularly in the time constraints of visitation time in a LDR.
Your question should ultimately be -- "Do I want to do a LDR?"
Can you set times to meet up for long periods of time (ie 2 or 3 weeks at a time, 2 weekends a month, etc?) Can you learn to make it a "game" out of counting it down in a sense, teasing each other and building up the anticipation of that moment of release when you'll be with the man you love?
Can you be faithful? What are you exactly looking for in the relationship? Are you going to be with this man long term and marry him, spend your life with him, grow old together? Can you merge your lives together and be one forever? What do you see for the two of you?
Can you see those things above with the other guy?
Maybe neither?
It's a lot of adjustment to deal with distance when it comes to being physical, but to decipher it properly, you need to ask if you can sacrifice consistent intimacy for the sake of maintaining a deep, close relationship with this man who obviously loves you enough to call you 3x a day and move into your area -- someone who essentially is willing to make sacrifices.
Instant gratification...or patient waiting for the reward? You need to decide that.
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