I have a problem, but I don't know where it is stemming from.
I have been irritable and angry for weeks. I have extreme mood swings. I can't sleep - even after taking stuff to help. I feel tired all the time.. lazy. I have deferred uni. I am constantly worrying about stuff...
A major problem is my relationship with my boyfriend of over 1 year. Things started off so well. Now, all of a sudden, everything annoys me. Not just with him- with everyone.. But mostly with him. I often look forward to seeing him.. but as soon as he is a minute later than he has told me he will be, my mood changes and I don't want to see him. As soon as he gets here I am angry. If he is on time, I am fine.. but it is only a matter of minutes before I'm snapping at him over nothing. One minute I am laughing and happy, the next minute I'm telling him to leave.
I feel so unmotivated. I am applying for work a bit. I am often not in the mood. If I just out of nowhere get inspired to write a job application, I tell him I will get started (hinting for him to leave). If he doesn't take the hint that instant, I go crazy!
I just have such a short fuse. It seems to be mostly around him.. but I don't think he is the cause. I just take it out on him.
I feel like I need a break from everyone.
I know this isn't healthy. Any ideas to make things better? Maybe I just need soem time to sort myself out, and then resume contact.
This probably won't make sense. I've been trying to sleep for ages but these thoughts are in my head.
Have you guys just recently started feeling this way? You could have a bit of an anxiety or depression problem. It definitely doesn't sound like a problem with your relationship, it sounds like you should go talk to a doctor. It could be anything from a psychological problem to a hormonal imbalance or chemical imbalance. Have you talked to your boyfriend about this? He needs to know that it's not HIM that's causing these mood swings in you, and he should be supportive of you while you search for the reasons why you're feeling this way.
I'd say the first thing you should do is get a complete physical, including blood work that checks your thyroid, blood sugar and hormone levels just to rule out any physiological causes for your mood swings. Has anything changed in your life recently, like a new job, new house, death in the family, anything like that? Are you basically happy in your relationship other than the little things that irk you? The fact that you acknowledge it and want to change is a good sign. If your boyfriend is willing to hang in there with you a little longer, I'm sure you can get to the bottom of it.
I am just worried it is going to ruin my realtionship in the future. I have been really horrible. I see myself do it, and then I feel bad... but not bad enough. I don't enjoy it, but I don't really care enough.
I have explained to him that I don't know why I'm acting this way. Some times he jokes about my mood swings.. but how long can someone really put up with someone like that?
I have been on the same BC pill for a few years. I stopped taking it last night. I have only been feeling this way for a month or two.. but I can't help think that the hormones have something to do with it.. even though they are the same as always. They have been a problem for a long time - no intimacy since January.. .. kind of strange since we are both 21. I don't think that has a very good effect on the relationship.. but that I know is from the pill... (which I have to take for medication).
I can't think of anything that has changed. I have had to put up with the housemate from Hell. That definately made me stressed and tired enough to suspend my course at university... which makes me more stressed, as it means I've got to find a job. Other than that, nothing much has changed. Nothing dramatic.
Thanks so much for your replies.
HelpHelpHelp - I hope you can figure out what is causing you to feel this way.
Another thought- are you on birth control pills? These can cause all the symptoms you're describing
I had this problem and it was scary...my birth control made me crazy and i don't say that lightly. I was very easily given anti depressant medications and that made everything worse and in the end it was my birth control.
Were you on BC pill for a while before the problem started? Or were you like that from when you started taking them?
I would love to think it was the pill causing it - I hate taking it. But I don't know whether it is possible for it to just cause the problem after a few years?
If it is the pill, I know it is not my fault that I have turned into this.
You have been given some excellent advice here. Do see a doctor and do try to figure out what is going on. You do sound like there are some anxiety and depression issues going on but I know I was miss diagnosed with that so I’m very leery of advising anyone to go that way. I was given medications on my first doctor visit no blood test nothing. Bam..I was depressed. And all I could think was just like that? Anyway that's my story and not yours, but my symptoms were bang on what your describing however my symptoms were also bang on with depression. I did have it out with my boyfriend...so badly in fact that I chucked him out of my house at 3:00 am in the morning. I was nuts. But what I want to say is let your guy know that you are going thru something and that it will take a little time for you to figure it out. Enlist his help and explain to him that you will need him to be patient and also vigilant in helping you take note of your moods. Also let him know that there may be times where you will be out of sorts and apologies in advance and ask him to understand and give you a little slack. You will not want to be kind when you lose control of your emotions so try and do it when you are calm and hopefully he will stick with you. Great that you are noticing this about yourself now..I was a long time and it did hurt my relationship at the time because I didn't realize while I was loosing it that it was me and not him or everyone else. Do seek help
Thanks Krissy. I will make an appointment with a doctor for this week. In the meantime, i won't take the pill anymore, as I want to stop taking it for a while anyway.
Can I ask, how are things with your boyfriend now? Can things go back to normal after that happened?
It is not just his thoughts I am worried about.. It is my feelings toward him. When he is not here, I miss him.. but after being around I change. I want things to go back to how they were (and really nothing has changed but me). If I get this sorted out, I just hope it is possible for me to tolerate being around him and others again.
My worry is that this has permanantly changed my view on him and other people.
I too had these problems when I took birth control pills!!! I was homicidal!!! I had to stop taking them and use something else.
Ladies, I want to tell you to go to the doc and get check ups!! Get whatever help you need and take care of yourselves!!! I have always had mood swings and trouble with hormones and my cycles! I bottled up my feelings and never learned to let things out, because when I did, they were major fits! So I kept my anger and feelings to myself.
Last Nov. I was in my livingroom and the next thing I knew I was in the ER hours later. I had a grand mahl at age 37. It has been linked to stress and now I have a seizure disorder and probably will be diagnosed with epilepsy soon. I have seizures now every month with my pms and period. I take meds that have bad side effects and are hard on me. I will never be the same! I have put my husband and 3 boys thru hell! I cannot and probably will never be able to drive again. I can't ride my horse or ski. I can't drink socially with my friends.
Why am I telling you this? To scare you!!!LOL Please, find out what is going on with you and fix it now!!! Reading your posts was like revisiting my younger days.
I'm also in the same boat
But I've suffered from anxiety and depression most of my life (medication helps but I don't want to rely on it for life)
So I've been off medication for a few years and recently my mood swings have returned... to the point where I never want to be around my boyfriend.
I agree with the person who said to get a physical...
I'm going to have one soon.
My worry is that this has permanantly changed my view on him and other people.
You'd be surprised how transcient these kind of feelings can be. Don't worry about that too much, just concentrate on feeling better. With the right treatment and the right situations, I don't think you'll have any problem getting back to your sweet, loving self again.
Yesterday I felt a lot better. It is Spring here, and was a nice day. We went for a walk and I explained how I was feeling. It went well. I didn't get angry once. It was actually nice.
I know that probably won't last. I used to be surprised if I could keep a steady mood for more than half an hour.
Your scare tactics do work.. However, I have been to doctors before with questions about whether the pill is causing certain things (infections), or making me feel certain ways, and they just say 'No'.. even though they are symptoms listed in the information booklet.
I am not sure whether it is possible to be feeling this much better after only 3 days off the pill.
I'm not sure what to ask for at the doctor? Just a general checkup? Or tell them what I have told here? My experience with doctors is that it is generally not worth going unless you have a specific, known purpose.
After yesterday, I am feeling optimistic and want to fix things. I realised how I should feel all of the time.
Sorry Green! I shouldn't really try to scare you, I am aiming more toward educating. I just mean to say that as a young woman, I had mood swings and never did anything about them. I just tried squelching all the bad feelings as a way to try to "be nicer". In doing so, I never let things out and my stress level got higher and higher.
I just wanted to let you know not to keep it bottled up. Once this happens, your health goes downhill. Doctors don't know it all! Drugs make each one of us feel differently, so if you think you feel better off the pill, then so be it.
As for what to tell your doc, I would just explain your mood swings for starters. They may want to check your blood and make sure you have no vitamin deficencies or even your thyroid.
!
.. kind of strange since we are both 21. I don't think that has a very good effect on the relationship.. but that I know is from the pill... (which I have to take for medication).
