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Old 09-10-2005, 12:32 PM   #1
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Join Date: Feb 2004
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mizvespa HB User
My boyfriend's comments & wandering eye

I have a little issue with my boyfriend, but I don't know if I'm being reasonable or not. Actually, it wasn't too big of an issue for me until I realized that it is an issue for other women. Here goes...

My boyfriend adores me - there is no doubt about that. We spend almost all of our time together, he is my best friend, he is very loving & affectionate, he constantly tells me how gorgeous & perfect he thinks I am, etc. I truly do trust him without a doubt, so there is no issue there. BUT, what is acceptable as far as a guy commenting to their girl on other females being hot? He doesn't just say it occasionally, but he REALLY makes lots of comments. Grant it, it's usually about people on TV & he has never flirted with another female in front of me or anything like that. Still... He constantly comments on how other chicks on TV , in magazines, and random people we know look. I think he also has a bit of a wandering eye when we go out, but I just let it roll off of my back because I know how crazy he is about me. I am not an insecure girl & I know he would never do anything to hurt me in any way. He has never disrespected me & he pays me more attention & compliments than anyone or anything in his life.

But, should I be offended? I've just noticed my girlfriends freaking out on their men when they say things, so I thought - should I feel the same way?? It has irritated me a few times, but I don't usually get mad about things like that.

 
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Old 09-10-2005, 12:41 PM   #2
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Join Date: Oct 2004
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LittleRose1982 HB User
Re: My boyfriend's comments & wandering eye

Why are you asking for a problem you don't have? As long as he is respectful and tasteful in his occasional admiration of other females, then you should be thanking your lucky stars that you're not bothered by it! All your girlfriends who can't handle this are the ones who have problems, not you. It could be that their boyfriends are vulgar and perverted when they make comments, or they say offensive things... doesn't matter. Don't compare yourself to them! Be happy with your man. He sounds wonderful.

 
Old 09-10-2005, 12:46 PM   #3
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Hiya HB User
Re: My boyfriend's comments & wandering eye

I agree. If it doesn't bother you, there's no rule that says you're wrong and it's "supposed" to bother you. I don't think it means that your other female friends are more insecure than you, everyone just has their own tolerence level. I personally think it's rude when a man continually openly gawks at other women, but that's just my standard. I don't believe that makes me insecure, it's just my personal taste. You don't have to abide by my feelings if you don't share them. If it truly doesn't bother you, then it's all good.

 
Old 09-10-2005, 03:13 PM   #4
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Join Date: Jan 2005
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evy38 HB User
Re: My boyfriend's comments & wandering eye

FYI, a woman can make another woman, who may be a 5 seem like a 10, or a 10 seem like a 5, depending on the way she behaves around her man. If you act jealous you "Up" the other womans value in your mans eyes. If you don't act threatened, you "up" your own value, in his eyes. You want to stop his comments? Remind him WHO you are! Next time he starts that CRAP, check your watch, (Implies the conversation is boring you), if he doesn't stop remind him you are NOT one of the guys and this IS NOT the locker room. Just because you love him, does not mean you need to put up with bad behavior.

 
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