Hi,
Haven;t posted much on here before, I am not sure what to do. I think I fancy my best mates sister (well I do fancy her), I am 18, so is my mate and his sister is a 16 but I really fancy her.
What do I do, I think I just have to ignore it because I don';t want to lose my best mate.
Any help or advice greatly needed and appreciated!!!
Not necessarily...in my view, before you totally forget about it, especially if you feel strongly about her and have felt that way for a long time, I'd suggest asking your friend how he would feel about you asking her on a date. You never know, he might be okay with it or at least not totally closed off to it, or he might need some time to think it over before deciding that it's not his business. If he's completely against the idea of you going out with her, then if you want to maintain the friendship, you should leave his sister alone. I think that you need to respect his wishes, as girls will come and go, especially at your age, but a good friend can last a lifetime or at least a long time. Honestly though, I'd probably move on and find a girl who's not related to any of your friends, because I think that even if he's okay with it, it could end up ruining your friendship if things don't end on a friendly note. It's probably best to keep your friendships and your romantic relationships separate so you don't risk losing a friend at the same time you lose a girlfriend if things weren't working out. It would be hard for him to be completely objective, and if you ever fought or split up, I'm sure he'd end up taking his sister's side because she's family, no matter how close your friendship. Anyway, the safest move is to accept that she's best left off limits to you, but if you decide that you want to give it a shot, make sure you get your friend's okay before you proceed and make a move on her unless you want him to get really mad or perhaps even end your friendship. Good luck...hopefully you will find a great girl soon, one way or another.
Agree about asking your friend about it. If youre close friends, he should at least be ok with you just asking. Like eaglesgirl said, you need to keep in mind the consequences of things going bad with her if you do date her. It will get really awkward with your friend after that.
I cannot put my friendship on the line, I cannot even suggest it to him because I don;t wanna break up this friendship. I think I am going to ignore my feelings for his sister but is that the right thing to do?
Yes, that seems to be the only choice left to you if you don't want to broach the subject with your friend. If the friendship means a lot to you and you aren't willing to lose him, then you would be much better off not pursuing anything with his girlfriend. But whatever you do, please don't go after her without being honest and upfront with your friend, or I can pretty much guarantee you'll ruin your friendship with him. The chances are decent that this could happen any way even if he gave you his blessing to go after his sister, because if things got bad or ugly between you and she, he would inevitably have to take her side and either cool off or cut off your relationship with him.