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Old 12-19-2005, 01:36 PM   #16
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Join Date: Sep 2004
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reddoorblack HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by greeneyes100
Great job! You didn't go into detail about your feelings and you were not available exactly at the time he wanted you. See, you can take your power back in a relationship anytime you want to. The key is not to let him know exactly what you are thinking or feeling. Once you do that, he has all the power to manipulate you.
Yes, I'm very glad I didn't send him that long email. I would have felt stupid. Thanks guys!

 
Old 12-19-2005, 01:49 PM   #17
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susieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB Usersusieq0726 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Hey Red,
When he calls or e-mails to confirm your next date, tell him you're sorry but you have to cancel,,,Spoon feed him some of his own medicine!

 
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Old 12-19-2005, 02:41 PM   #18
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SophiaM HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by reddoorblack
Normally I wouldn't make that assumption but get this---The last time he asked me to come over and to "pack an over night bag" he asked me if I was on any sort of "protection." It's safe to say what he's got in mind. At least offer to take me to dinner and a movie first!!!
Wow, I didn't see that, either. He sounds like a total jerk. I'm sorry.

 
Old 12-21-2005, 08:16 AM   #19
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Join Date: Sep 2004
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reddoorblack HB User
Re: Help needed...

I've got an update. He called last night and said "hey, no phone call or emails? I miss you. I want to see you." I took GE's advice and disappeard for about 5 days - no contact. I almost fainted when he said this, "I'm coming to pick you up after work and we're going out." Then he started the "pack a bag" talk again. I firmly said, " I told you I can't do that!" Then I said, "how about this... come over after work and I'll cook dinner for you." That's what we are doing. I haven't made my mind up about this one yet. Now I have to figure out what to make for dinner!!!

 
Old 12-21-2005, 08:27 AM   #20
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greeneyes100 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by reddoorblack
I've got an update. He called last night and said "hey, no phone call or emails? I miss you. I want to see you." I took GE's advice and disappeard for about 5 days - no contact. I almost fainted when he said this, "I'm coming to pick you up after work and we're going out." Then he started the "pack a bag" talk again. I firmly said, " I told you I can't do that!" Then I said, "how about this... come over after work and I'll cook dinner for you." That's what we are doing. I haven't made my mind up about this one yet. Now I have to figure out what to make for dinner!!!
Reddoor, great news! I told you it would work. You go girl!

 
Old 12-21-2005, 09:27 AM   #21
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SophiaM HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by reddoorblack
I've got an update. He called last night and said "hey, no phone call or emails? I miss you. I want to see you." I took GE's advice and disappeard for about 5 days - no contact. I almost fainted when he said this, "I'm coming to pick you up after work and we're going out." Then he started the "pack a bag" talk again. I firmly said, " I told you I can't do that!" Then I said, "how about this... come over after work and I'll cook dinner for you." That's what we are doing. I haven't made my mind up about this one yet. Now I have to figure out what to make for dinner!!!
Hey, now that's much better! Hmm, how about grilled salmon with potatoes and a nice salad with olive oil and balsamic vinegar for an appetizer? Hmm, I really like my own advice--maybe will have that for dinner myself Good luck, Red--have a great date!

 
Old 12-21-2005, 11:45 AM   #22
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dewdrop333 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Personally I like the down home meal ... pot roast garlic potatoes and green beans .. tossed salad ..

But I think thats the EX midwestern girl speaking ... a full man is a happy man!
__________________
Mother is the word for God on the lips and hearts of children - The Crow

 
Old 12-21-2005, 12:00 PM   #23
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Hangin in There HB User
Re: Help needed...

It's not good enough if YOU use birth control. HE needs to provide protection.

 
Old 12-21-2005, 12:10 PM   #24
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degen95 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by SophiaM
Hey, now that's much better! Hmm, how about grilled salmon with potatoes and a nice salad with olive oil and balsamic vinegar for an appetizer? Hmm, I really like my own advice--maybe will have that for dinner myself Good luck, Red--have a great date!
grilled salmon sounds good..you read my mind. rice is better than the potatoes though..

 
Old 12-21-2005, 12:13 PM   #25
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SophiaM HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by degen95
grilled salmon sounds good..you read my mind. rice is better than the potatoes though..
I'm fine with rice. Are you cooking?

 
Old 12-21-2005, 12:29 PM   #26
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LittleRose1982 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Red, I'm sorry to bring things down a little but it really does sound like this guy just wants to sleep with you. He asked if you are on "protection"? Good Lord, I would have cursed him out right then and there! How dare anyone presume!! You did the right thing by not talking to him and not accepting his "proposal". But it's only natural for a guy not to just give up on the pursuit of sex so easily. He's trying again. He could be putting on the moves, trying to butter you up by saying he misses you. Hey, he could have called too and he didn't!
I don't know, if you really feel he deserves your hard work in the kitchen, then that's your call. But just be very cautious as you proceed. And I would definitely not sleep with him. Usually I would say just go with what feels right, but something just bugs me about this situation. I think it's the "protection" thing, and the fact that he doesn't want to take you out for an actual date, but rather have you spend the night. He just sounds like a real creep.

 
Old 12-21-2005, 12:32 PM   #27
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degen95 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by SophiaM
Are you cooking?
wouldn't have it any other way

 
Old 12-21-2005, 12:34 PM   #28
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SophiaM HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by LittleRose1982
Red, I'm sorry to bring things down a little but it really does sound like this guy just wants to sleep with you. He asked if you are on "protection"? Good Lord, I would have cursed him out right then and there! How dare anyone presume!! You did the right thing by not talking to him and not accepting his "proposal". But it's only natural for a guy not to just give up on the pursuit of sex so easily. He's trying again. He could be putting on the moves, trying to butter you up by saying he misses you. Hey, he could have called too and he didn't!
I don't know, if you really feel he deserves your hard work in the kitchen, then that's your call. But just be very cautious as you proceed. And I would definitely not sleep with him. Usually I would say just go with what feels right, but something just bugs me about this situation. I think it's the "protection" thing, and the fact that he doesn't want to take you out for an actual date, but rather have you spend the night. He just sounds like a real creep.
Yeah, that one comment just sounded so calculated AND presumptuous. I must admit it would bug me, too. Red, maybe you SHOULD take him up on his offer to take you out after all? Seems like he hasn't done anything special for you in a while.

 
Old 12-21-2005, 03:38 PM   #29
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reddoorblack HB User
Re: Help needed...

Too late now. The plans have already been made. Trust me, I'm a very strong person. Sex is NOT going to happen. In fact, the main reason I invited him for dinner rather than go to a public place is so that I can have a talk with him. I'm going to tell him how I feel about the whole situation and if he doesn't like it, so be it. Thanks so much guys for caring. I'll update you all in the morning.

 
Old 12-21-2005, 04:01 PM   #30
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greeneyes100 HB User
Re: Help needed...

Quote:
Originally Posted by reddoorblack
Too late now. The plans have already been made. Trust me, I'm a very strong person. Sex is NOT going to happen. In fact, the main reason I invited him for dinner rather than go to a public place is so that I can have a talk with him. I'm going to tell him how I feel about the whole situation and if he doesn't like it, so be it. Thanks so much guys for caring. I'll update you all in the morning.
I really don't think you should reveal your emotions at this time, but if that's what you want to do, then go ahead. If I were you, I would show him with actions that you want more than what he is giving.

 
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