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Old 12-29-2005, 07:50 PM   #1
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Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

A few years back, my company hired a woman who was absolutely gorgeous. She was young, had a great face and body, and naturally caught the attention of all the men. Every guy was friendly with her, but none of the women in the office liked her. They were friendly to her face, but behind her back they talked about her. They thought she was full of herself and one woman even suggested she had some plastic surgery. I had talked to this woman several times and she always seemed warm and friendly and didn't have even the slightest attitude.

This year, my company hired a guy who's really good looking. He's young, athletic, and would be considered "hot" by most women's standards. All the women in our office drool over him. The men in our office are aware of what the women think, but they're not the least bit jealous. He's liked by everyone and none of the men talk about him behind his back or accuse him of having an attitude or talk about his looks.

So why is it that women seem to be threatened by attractive women but men don't seem to be threatened by attractive men?

 
Old 12-29-2005, 08:08 PM   #2
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

I think men are probably just as threatened by another good looking man... but they are just too proud or egotistical (not in a sarcastic way - don't bash me men!!) to voice it, unlike women who will b!!tch freely about anything. Although they are probably not anywhere near as vindictive as women can be. It's just our natures.

I guess it's just one of the obvious differences between men and women and how each sex has evolved.
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Old 12-29-2005, 08:29 PM   #3
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

You don't have to be attractive to make woman mean or jealos. They can always find something to be jealos. Man can be mean as well, but overall better be in a group were more men than women.

 
Old 12-29-2005, 09:47 PM   #4
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

A womans jelousy is simple. we are threatened because the attention that we were getting is taken away. With any situation like that its simply because they are threatened. Like if my boyfriend were to walk by a girl and say "shes cute" or something I would get mad. I know i shouldn't and i know its simply his oppinion but womens heads work in a strange matter. Soon we'd be onto the "why arent I 'cute'", "would he rather be with her and not me" yada yada.... its insane but true. not for most but for some i know!! As for guys.. i believe they just may be more secure. Women, for the most part, are just insecure!

 
Old 12-30-2005, 06:25 AM   #5
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Let me chip in as a bloke. We definitely get jealous of the good looking types, too! Well, I know I do. But it is virtually unheard of for us to admit that to other men. I hear conversations every day between the girls in our office about how lovely so and so's hair looks today or how so and so should be a model. Of course blokes are never going to have such conversations And likewise, where women will openly say "Oh, so and so is so much better looking than me!", [most] men would never do that. And we certainly wouldn't be bitchy about it!

So when it comes to friendships between the average guys and the good looking geezer, we don't harbour any predetermined hostility towards him. Yeah, he's good looking, but that's life. If anything, we're more likely to ride his coat-tails and make alliances with him to partake in some of the female attention that he is bound to receive. And secretly we might be waiting for his personality to let down his looks!! But we would never chat about the guy behind his back saying how jealous he makes us because that would constitute defeat, which men detest.
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Old 12-30-2005, 07:27 AM   #6
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Men are competitive with one another, but if someone who looked like Brad Pitt or George Clooney walked into our office, I seriously doubt you would see the other guys avoiding being friends with him. Sure, deep down they may wish they could attract women the way those guys do, but we don't look at him as the enemy. But if a really attractive woman walks in, the other women tell themselves, "we'll be friendly to her, but we don't like her." They won't be friends with her, they won't have lunch with her or go for drinks with her. But men aren't likely to react that way. The guy may be popular with the women, but that won't stop them from hanging out with him, getting a beer with him, or playing basketball with him.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 07:37 AM   #7
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

We could pontificate for hours on this subject, but like comediane Marcia Warfield once said, "men think really good looking men are gay. Women know good looking women aren't gay. They're bi***es." I think men would be intimidated by a really powerful, Donald Trump type who makes a lot of money. A man's biggest asset is his wallet, a woman's is her looks. Men go for pretty women more often than not, and women go for successful, financially viable more often than not. This is a sweeping generalization, but women like to be pretty, and men like to feel they can provide. That's what's most important to each sex, so when someone else of the same sex comes along that can do it better, we feel threatened. Men don't feel as threatened by good looking men because women don't care as much about looks as men do, so a good looking man isn't a threat because the good looking guy isn't the one who always wins the girl. The guy with the Porche does.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 08:47 AM   #8
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Quote:
Originally Posted by Hiya
We could pontificate for hours on this subject, but like comediane Marcia Warfield once said, "men think really good looking men are gay. Women know good looking women aren't gay. They're bi***es." I think men would be intimidated by a really powerful, Donald Trump type who makes a lot of money. A man's biggest asset is his wallet, a woman's is her looks. Men go for pretty women more often than not, and women go for successful, financially viable more often than not. This is a sweeping generalization, but women like to be pretty, and men like to feel they can provide. That's what's most important to each sex, so when someone else of the same sex comes along that can do it better, we feel threatened. Men don't feel as threatened by good looking men because women don't care as much about looks as men do, so a good looking man isn't a threat because the good looking guy isn't the one who always wins the girl. The guy with the Porche does.
that is excellent..i think its so true.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 09:30 AM   #9
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

If that is true, the world is truly a sad place. I have a pretty good income and drive a nice car, but if a woman showed interest in me for either of those reasons, I would be SOOOO turned off.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 09:36 AM   #10
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Quote:
Originally Posted by OutToLunch
If that is true, the world is truly a sad place. I have a pretty good income and drive a nice car, but if a woman showed interest in me for either of those reasons, I would be SOOOO turned off.
Well, I want to make a distinction between the gold digger, the woman who is beautiful and knows it, and uses it to land the richest man around, and separate her from the average nice looking woman, who is looking for a man who won't always be borrowing money from her, bumming rides, asking to flop at her place, leaving it a mess, never has health insurance, is always between jobs, etc. Women do think about things like, "what if I want to quit and raise babies full time? What if I have a difficult pregancy and can't work the whole last trimester? What if our kid wants to be an olympic star and needs thousands of dollars a year for trainers, fees, outfits, etc." A really handsome, cute bum will lose out to a not-so-good looking guy with his feet on the ground. Men do it too, let's be honest. Given the choice, the really hot girl who is nice and cool, but has a few issues, will win out over the fat plain Jane with a heart of absolute gold.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 12:10 PM   #11
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

So true.

Facts of life, sometimes they aren't pretty. But there is a clear distinction between "Gold diggers" and women who just want to ensure they have someone as stable as themselves.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 02:27 PM   #12
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Nobody is threatened by my fat booty . If they were I would say get a grip, start thinking more highly of yourself then you wouldn't have to put others down . I feel women are way too competitive with each other, and don't support each other enough. I think women need to compliment each other more instead of being envious over something petty. I have made a point of complimenting my female friends lately, it helps to bond us together better, and lifts their mood. This is just my two cents .

 
Old 12-30-2005, 03:31 PM   #13
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

It's interesting that this was brought up, because I have had to deal with some real jealousy at my work with the women. I have come to realize that sometimes it is a valid jealousy. I have noticed that when I make a mistake, the men are pretty forgiving. I am offered help all the time. And men are frequently trying to talk and joke with me. On the other hand, I have heard some real negative comments by male coworkers about other female coworkers that are what would be considered less attractive. I have noticed heavy-set women are the most ridiculed by the men, even if the men are heavy themselves. If those women make a mistake, they are often humilated and put-down by the men. Over time, I have been able to make friends with not all, but most of the women at my work. I think I earned respect from the other women by not allowing the men to give me any special allowances. I also defend any female coworker that I feel is being treated unjustly.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is if the attractive person is also a good person on the inside, and a hard worker, eventually most the jealousy fades away.
Men and women are also very different in their jealousy. Women are jealous of looks, men are jealous of power. I have seen plenty of male coworkers get very jealous of the more successful male coworkers. The male coworker that sells the most, climbs the ladder faster, gets the big bonus, are the men that other male coworkers are jealous of.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 05:18 PM   #14
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Very true about the male gender.

 
Old 12-30-2005, 05:56 PM   #15
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Re: Why Are Women More Threatened By Attractive Women?

Quote:
Originally Posted by desertdweller
The male coworker that sells the most, climbs the ladder faster, gets the big bonus, are the men that other male coworkers are jealous of.
That's certainly true. If a man succeeds, the other men who have the same job but have not achieved the same success will be jealous and find ways to put down the guy who did better. They'll imply that he kissed up, had an unfair advantage, or did something other than earn it.

 
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