Getting to know people talkes time. Inviting someone to a movie or to lunch is a great first step, as this will allow you to see the person in a more natural, relaxed environment.
Don't worry about asking a lot of questions at first...just go with the flow of the conversation. I'm sure that you have good judgement, and will at least screen to make sure the person isn't a serial killer
. Hey, even if you find that you aren't a match, at least you will have had a nice time with another person and have grown as a person, yourself, from the experience.
Some of my coworkers have been trying to set me up with their guy friends. I tell them how much I appreciate their sweetness, but I also make sure to add that if he and I don't hit it off, at least I will have made a friend
. I think that's how you need to approach it. See it as simply making another friend
. This tends to help me to relax in these situations, anyway.
Interestingly, I have dated about five guys in my life, and most I am still friends with. In fact, I have made plans to get together with one of them next weekend. He, his girlfriend, and I went to the park a few months ago, I really liked it, and I thought it would be a fun thing to do again. He loved the idea, has told me how he has been doing, and we should all be meeting next weekend to talk, walk, and goof around