Many posts on the board about woman not wanting boring men. What makes a man boring? Seems some women feel a responsible guy is boring. Would you rather have a career challenged man to be with. Yea, he"ll spend alot of time with you. While you work for him.
Sex. A nice guy is boring in bed. That"s like saying, A woman who dances well, is wild in bed. One has nothing to do with another.
Seems like alot of women want a bad guy. Cute for high school. In the real world, not good relationship material.
Maybe women just don"t know what they want. Is the media to blame? Shows like Sex In The City are followed like their the only way to be. People seem to quote the show like it"s reality. Maybe the lines of reality have blurred so much. It has change how people think.
Hey, man, I can relate! I seem to meet a lot of girls who say "You're going to make a great husband one day!". It's a lovely sentiment but it's not what I want to hear right now at the age of 22 I wish these girls would make the connection and realise that good husband material is also good boyfriend material! Just because I don't muck around like most guys my age doesn't make me boring; I'm just a bit more serious and mature and that's the way I've always been, but there's plenty about me that's interesting and fun, too! I might not be in trouble with the law, a mid-level drug dealer, clinically depressed, tatooed, in a struggling band, on the dole, or have a habbit of mooning in public, but that doesn't make me boring!!
isn't it also funny how they "know" everything about you from just one characteristic as well?? they always generalize. but, you are right. women only "say" they want one thing and chase after another...they say "you'll make a great husband" or that you're "cute". you never want to be "cute" to women, you want to be "sexy"...
but its not their fault. they can't be responsible for how they feel, no one is.
Some women don't know what they want, makes me wonder how they get through life. They want a guy to love them and take care of them, they find one and run a mile.
I've learnt now that I've attracted women I really like but as soon as they find out I'm a 'nice guy' they run a mile, so I'm changing myself I'm not going to be a caring guy anymore. I've been brought up the 'nice guy' through social conditioning, my family and school teachers have taught us males to suck up to females and basically most women treat us with no respect and generalise us. Well it's time for a revolution my friend men should act like men again, well the ones who are not.
I also believe the media is to blame with a lot of the social issues these days. People with fragile minds get to influenced by the crap shown on TV, people should really think for themselves instead of following a trend. I believe women are bigger sheep then men, they are way more adaptable to change.
How many here think bad men have it better then nice ones? Do you think they are bad because they like themselves or they like women? Because, quite frankly, if they liked either one, they wouldn't treat women the way they do. Men who treat women badly, treat everyone the same. Many women prefer men who don't really want them, or at least, don't want the woman as much as the woman wants the man. I think it's the excitment of the "winning" that counts. Once a woman is mistakenly sure she has the bad boy, she immediately starts trying to turn him into a "nice guy". She believes her love will "fix" him. I think it's an ego thing, it makes her special to "catch and tame" him. What a load of work! I prefer my men housebroken. I also think, as most women get older and more emotionally mature, kindness and respect, from a man, becomes much more of a turn on. After a burn or two, a man who is kind and respectful, is much easier for a women to give her heart, and body, to. I think a smart woman knows they are far more likely to be better cared for.
nah, dude, never change who you are to please THEM. you should be the one qualifying THEM to be with you, not the other way around. you can change certain things on a small scale. being yourself weeds out SO MANY of the wrong women for you anyway, why would you not want this?
I've learnt now that I've attracted women I really like but as soon as they find out I'm a 'nice guy' they run a mile.
This is true. I sometimes get the impression that girls are attracted to me because I have got a friendly, somewhat androgynous, face which gives them signals that I am a caring person. But when push comes to shove they're easily distracted by the brute with the mean eyes and stubble who doesn't have the unattracitve quality of being a "nice guy".
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morboro
... family and school teachers have taught us males to suck up to females and basically most women treat us with no respect and generalise us.
It's a sad point to make, but I believe that there is some truth to this, also. We're taught at school about how women have had a tough time of it until the 20th century as though we, as five-sixteen year-old boys, are responsible for this! And biology lessons teach us that men can't help being sex-crazed beasts because it's in our genetic make-up. Evolution or not, I don't go around wanting to mate with every woman I see!!
nah, dude, never change who you are to please THEM. you should be the one qualifying THEM to be with you, not the other way around. you can change certain things on a small scale. being yourself weeds out SO MANY of the wrong women for you anyway, why would you not want this?
Well I'm not going to change my self all together, most likely small scale, I'm going to be to man I've always wanted to be, I want to be in control not them.
Edit:
I also want to change myself not just for the female side of things, but also for me professionally. I'm sick of being 'pushed' aside by most people, it makes me feel worthless and weak to be honest, sometimes being an extra nice guy comes with a price and that is letting people walk all over you.
I'm almost 22yo, I've got my whole life ahead of me and there is nothing better than changing myself at such a young age.
This is MY definition of boring. Who would want a man like this?
My ex-boyfriend only saw me on Saturday nights. During a six-month period he wore the same shirt 26 times in a row!
He would only call me on scheduled days of the week, at approximately the same time, and repeat the same cliches. If he got my voice mail, he wouldn't say anything romantic. He would IDENTIFY himself....after three years.
His gifts lacked imagination. He asked for a particular CD for his birthday. He bought me the same CD two months later for Christmas.
When we DID go out to eat, he would take me to the same two or three restaurants (only cheap ones....with a coupon).
This is MY definition of boring. Who would want a man like this?
My ex-boyfriend only saw me on Saturday nights. During a six-month period he wore the same shirt 26 times in a row!
He would only call me on scheduled days of the week, at approximately the same time, and repeat the same cliches. If he got my voice mail, he wouldn't say anything romantic. He would IDENTIFY himself....after three years.
His gifts lacked imagination. He asked for a particular CD for his birthday. He bought me the same CD two months later for Christmas.
When we DID go out to eat, he would take me to the same two or three restaurants (only cheap ones....with a coupon).
Most "nice guys" aren't really that nice, I mean plenty of them have many qualities as "bad boy". Of course we know that women don't exactly go for bad guys who actually treat them like crap, they just goes for guys who are way too confident, seemly sure of themseleves (most "nice guys" are like that too, they just don't feel the need to express it out that way), dress certain way, guys who seemly "unavaible" and so on. I'm not sure, women are just THAT complicated. I got an example here: A bad boy named Mark and another "nice guy" named Mike. Say a lady (whom they both like and she too likes them but were not sure which one she would like to go out with) were talking to them about boyfriend break up thing, a good guy would say sweet things and blow her away, while the bad boy would be like "F*** that stupid fa***t, you derserve so much better baby, blah blah blah. The way "bad boy" respond and talk might attract her much more than good guy would even though he have all the right moves. It isn't always like this though but just to give you an idea of how women can be like in life, what attract them and whatnot.
P.S: I might be wrong but that had been my experience from seeing how guys attract ladies, viewing profiles (and saw which profiles have the most 'friends", and so on) and of course, my personal experience as well.
HIT, you can't be serious!! anyway, don't think that all nice guys will be like that
btw, how did you ever agree to go out with him in the first place?? was he always like that??
I am absolutely serious!
Of course, I didn't know how he was when I first met him. I thought the identifying himself would end after six months...then a year...then two.....
The same shirt thing happened about half way during the relationship. He never did wear a big variety of clothes, but that took the cake. Apparently, it never occurred to that bozo that I would get TIRED of seeing the same shirt week after week.
This is MY definition of boring. Who would want a man like this?
My ex-boyfriend only saw me on Saturday nights. During a six-month period he wore the same shirt 26 times in a row!
He would only call me on scheduled days of the week, at approximately the same time, and repeat the same cliches. If he got my voice mail, he wouldn't say anything romantic. He would IDENTIFY himself....after three years.
His gifts lacked imagination. He asked for a particular CD for his birthday. He bought me the same CD two months later for Christmas.
When we DID go out to eat, he would take me to the same two or three restaurants (only cheap ones....with a coupon).
Same old same old.
26 times????? This seems like an overexaggeration. You kept a daily chart or what???? He would wear the shirt everyday like a cartoon character?
Maybe he was in uniform for his job or had 26 articles of the same shirt?
After reading that I can't help but think that every other point you made is a superficial overexaggeration too. btw, why are clothes so important anyhow? Does the way you dress have some correlation with personality? I'm no scientist, but I'd have to lean towards no they don't.
Spent three years with a guy and now belittles him. Why date so long if he was such a boring guy?
Good point! I'm forever hearing stories from girls about how their current/ex-boyfriend had all these annoying habbits (cheaping out all the time, getting into a routine about sex, never making romantic gestures, etc.), and I think to myself "Why didn't you leave him?!!". But if I actually ask them this, they look at me like I just asked them to kill their parents! You're never too old to settle for someone about whom you spend your spare time bickering about And more fool you if you did!
Boring men 
I wish these girls would make the connection and realise that good husband material is also good boyfriend material! Just because I don't muck around like most guys my age doesn't make me boring; I'm just a bit more serious and mature and that's the way I've always been, but there's plenty about me that's interesting and fun, too! I might not be in trouble with the law, a mid-level drug dealer, clinically depressed, tatooed, in a struggling band, on the dole, or have a habbit of mooning in public, but that doesn't make me boring!! 
I also think, as most women get older and more emotionally mature, kindness and respect, from a man, becomes much more of a turn on. After a burn or two, a man who is kind and respectful, is much easier for a women to give her heart, and body, to. I think a smart woman knows they are far more likely to be better cared for.
