What wonderful advice, Music!!!
I totally agree.....cqgmom, you are both on 2nd marriages and statistics already show that second marriages have a 60% chance of failing and I think that it is yours & your husbands job to make sure you do not fall into those statistics which are already overwhelming.
Taking the stress off of yourselves is imperative to the overall happiness of your marriage & family. Bringing another child into the equation when you are already seeking counseling is not the wisest decision.
A child should not be the source of happiness but the product of it.
You already have two beautiful children between you, one of which you had together. Like Music said it should be your highest priority to meld this new family together and make it a success. Your have a beautiful son together and a 5 year old stepdaughter who deserve two happy people in their lives with minimal stress. Focus on that for now and put having another baby on the back burner. In another year or two reevaluate things.
I have a brother and sister in law who went through invitro and onto GIFT....they had a set of fraternal twins and 14 months later on their own had a set of identical and then 15 months after that had another one.....all girls!!!
Yes...the stress of getting to the first pregnancy through the use of invitro was overwhelming and alot to place on a couple in a first
marriage without any other children in their lives.....I could only imagine that with a second
marriage and melding two families it could very well be the straw that breaks the camel's back!!! Focus on alleviating the stress & enjoying your new marriage and the two healthy kids that you do have. You owe it to yourselves, your marriage & your family to make this all work out.