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Old 01-15-2006, 07:00 AM   #1
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Dreamer555 HB User
Arrow Too Broken Hearted, Need Help!

I am a 25 y/o female who was with someone for a year. I fell deeply in love with him and our relationship was great. One day out of no where he just broke up with me, saying it's too much. I loved him too much was the reason. It's been 4 months now and I can't get over it, I am severely depressed and work ALL the time, everyday to keep my mind off of it. I need help but who can help me?

 
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Old 01-15-2006, 12:57 PM   #2
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ErimusValidus HB User
Re: Too Broken Hearted, Need Help!

Hiya, Dreamer555 In my experience the only person who can truly help you is your next partner. Until you make steps to find someone new you will continue to hanker after the person you lost most recently. Take it one step at a time: find a guy you like the look of and focus your attention on him. Granted, you might get hurt to find out that he's not interested or not single, but it won't hurt anywhere near as much as your last boyfriend breaking up with you did! Please try to find someone new. I'm not saying it's easy, but any time spent thinking about your ex is wasted time. So go out and flirt
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Old 01-15-2006, 02:14 PM   #3
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reddoorblack HB User
Re: Too Broken Hearted, Need Help!

Dreamer, I've gone through a very difficult break up and made it out the other side of the tunnel that you find yourself in. There's nothing you can really do with the pain except live with it and deal with the best way you can. For me, it was getting up every morning for work, putting on the false smile and getting through the day. I'd go home and cry and scream my head off. I was in a horrible depression. This lasted for a while but I do promise you it gets better. When I found this site, it was during the most horrible time of my life. Everybody kept telling me, it just takes time. They were right. It takes time but give yourself permission to cry or scream or get drunk or stay in bed. Do what you need to. I sunk myself into many self help books at the time. That sort of helped. Most of all, come here and vent. The people here are wonderful.

 
Old 01-15-2006, 02:51 PM   #4
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Ruth6:11 HB UserRuth6:11 HB User
Re: Too Broken Hearted, Need Help!

Part of the healing is going to be learning from your mistakes. You say that he told you that you loved him too much. One of the hard lessons you will have learned from this is not to overwhelm the next guy.
Many people find it overwhelming to have someone's entire focus and well-being dependent on them. It can be suffocating.

Rather than jump right into another relationship and risk feeling extra insecure, consider finding out who you are withOUT a man in your life for six months or more. Cultivate galpals, volunteer somewhere, find an all-consuming hobby!

Rather than making someone else the center of your universe, make yourSELF the center of your universe and have the next relationship enhance a life that is already good.

 
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