I'll try to make my story as short as possible with the most info. Here goes... I am currently 36 weeks pregnant with my boyfriend of 1 1/2 years. Throughout most of my pregnancy he has been pretty rude to me saying that I cheat on him and lie to him about other things (which he did before I was pregnant, and I know I'm stupid not to have left then). Other times, however we get along good and everytime I think everything will be okay he gets mad about something or accuses me of something else based on his assumptions and not valid facts or any evidence. He just thinks
something about me and that's enough for him.
I can't even tell you how sick and tired I am of him acting this way to me because I want more than anything to know he respects me (and even though he tells me he loves me I don't feel like it or he wouldn't act this way) and I don't feel like he respects me. He tries to make me out to be some kind of bad girl that I'm totally not at all and I don't want to be with a man that thinks this way of me. Then at other times he treats me normal...I don't understand him at all. I really do love him and want to start our family happily since the baby is coming soon which I'm very excited about, but it makes me scared to know I'm having a baby with a man I'm unsure about. (This baby is both our first, I am 20 he is 26).
Today is what did it I think because the whole pregnancy he has been asking me if the baby is really his and he says he wasn't around much at the time I got pregnant so he thinks I was cheating. I've never once even THOUGHT about cheating let alone did it since we were together. I'm not like that and he doesn't see that I guess. And if it's not bad enough he's been asking me all the time my whole pregnancy so far if I'm seeing or talking to any other guys or if I bring them in the house when he's at work (Yeah right, like any other guy even wants me right now with my huge belly and swollen ankles, lol). Anyway, I cried until my eyes were swollen because he said he wants to take a paternity test and he didn't understand why I was crying. He just thought I was crying because I was worried what the results were going to be. My pregnancy emotions are getting the best of me and that made me cry even more because it's so not true! but he never listens when I try to tell him that.
I'm sorry for writing a diary, lol, but I really need some advice. Should I stay or go? Of course I want to stay for the baby's sake because she deserves to grow up with a mother and a father under the same roof, but I don't feel like things will get better just because of a baby. He'll treat the baby good but I think he'll continue being rude to me, and then nice when he wants to be. I guess it's one of those "miserable with him, miserable without him" situations. Any help would greatly be appreciated! Thanks a ton