Originally Posted by Music4All
You will never be happy or even be in a genuine mindset to try to make things work if you have thoughts and feeling about your lover. That is very unfair to your husband. Almost no marriage can measure up to the uncommittal passion generated from an adulterous affair. If you had problems in bed before your affair, they will only get worse in your mind as long as you have your affair as a measuring rod.
Very sorry to hear of your problem, and I wish I could express my sympathies to your husband as well.
i am trying hard to be serious or to have a peaceful life again.To be a normal plain housewife. the problem is me and my ex -bf ( ex love affair ) still has regular communication through e-mails,phones (once in a while ) and we send each others gifts during special occasion.we are like friends but we still care about each other.i dont want to lose him or to avoid contacts with him.if he cant be my partner i want him to be my friend, at least. He still cares for me but hes too far away and i am here in asia.hes young,needs to pursue his dreams and ambitions,and hes not ready for a commitment.i have a lot of issues here myself and its too complicated for us to continue our relationship.But we still care for each other.
a part of me wants to save this marriage because i also care and i need him.
I dont know where id be if this marriage would end,thats the truth. If ihave a lot of money,if i have a proper visa and can go whenever i want to iwill go where my heart belongs to. But i cant because i have a lot of issues and people back home needs my support and my husband cannot take it if id leave him i guess...
I guess this is my life and i have to sacrifice.I want to be happy.I wanna try to start again with my husband and see how it goes.If i am destined to be like this then maybe this is it.