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Old 08-09-2006, 04:54 AM   #1
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How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Hello again. Well I have come to realize a few things about me and my ex. One is that I don't really want to be with him per say. Everything is so confusing with my feelings, I really need some help. I love this man so very much, but he has done me so wrong. I love him for his good qualities but I hate him for the bad ones. I have realized that I don't "want" to be with him in a relationship sort of way. When I am with him, I always have the distrust and the thing in the back of my mind telling me it's not good. I spent last saturday with him, which was a huge mistake, but on Sunday I was so ready to go back home. I think I enjoy spending the nights wiht him..sleeping in his arms and making love to him. Does this sound normal? I do have some concerns though. I know he is dating others, and it is driving me insane. I just keep thinking about him sleeping next to them, and having sex together and it gives me an aweful feeling in the pit of my stomach. I don't want to feel like this anymore. I just want to get to the point where I don't care what he does with other girls but for now, I don't see any end in sight. Can someone help me overcome these horrid feelings in the pit of my stomach?

 
Old 08-09-2006, 04:59 AM   #2
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Also one more thought.. could this be something like "If I can't have him, I don't want anyone else to have him". I feel so depressed. I love him so much but I know I can't be with him

 
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Old 08-09-2006, 05:11 AM   #3
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Girl....the only way you can get rid of those feelings in your stomach is by getting rid of the cause. That man.

I have been in situations like this....you tell yourself you like him, but your body totally rejects the idea and it causes anxiety. But once you take the step to end things, you'll start to feel better about your decision and you'll have peace with it.

It could be a few things..
You like the way he makes you feel...or...your in love with the man you WANT him to be. But hes not.

Its obvious to me you dont really want to be with him. You'll be okay, just trust your "inner voice" lol.
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Old 08-10-2006, 09:57 AM   #4
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

In normal situations this would NOT be what you would want to do but in those kinds of situations it helps me to dwell HEAVILY on the bad parts of the relationship--what you don't like about him, things he does to make you mad etc. It helps me anyway

 
Old 08-10-2006, 10:07 AM   #5
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

"Can someone help me overcome these horrid feelings in the pit of my stomach?"

Take some peptol bismol and stop sleeping with him. Ok, seriously, you're playing with fire. That terrible feeling in the pit of your stomach is there for a reason. It's a warning that you're trying to ignore. All it takes is one women with an STD for him to give you the gift that keeps on giving. Plus, by wasting your time with a guy like this, you could be missing out on finding a great guy who really wants to be with you.

 
Old 08-10-2006, 11:06 AM   #6
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Yeah, cookie is totally right. That bad feeling in your stomach is your instincts, telling you that this is a terrible situation for you to be in. You're putting yourself at great risk here both emotionally and physically, and you really need to stop before you feel even worse. Save your time and energy and body for someone who really cares about you...if that's what you want, why are you settling for so much less?

 
Old 08-10-2006, 12:01 PM   #7
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

I guess I'm hung up on this guy because he made me feel things that I never thought were possible. Yes, he treated me like crap most of the time, but when things were good, they were REALLY good. He's the only guy I've ever truly been in love with, the only guy that has ever made my heart flutter even 2 years after being together..just a whole lot of stuff. I mean I know I don't want to be with him in a relationship, but it still hurts that another women is getting all of his "goodness". If that makes any sense

 
Old 08-10-2006, 12:06 PM   #8
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

the only way you will get over this and feel better is to have NO CONTACT

don't try to be his friend, you don't need to know what's going on in his life......you shouldn't even care.

the longer you keep in contact the longer it will take to heal.....you're just picking a scab off over and over......

my advice, pull the band aid off.....quick....it'll only hurt for a minute

 
Old 08-10-2006, 12:17 PM   #9
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

So he made you feel things that you never thought were possible. That was then. Now what are you feeling? Like crap? Insecurity? Heartbreak? Distrust? Now he's using another woman who will inevitably be hurt by him too. He's using her just like he's using you. He's got it made since you're both giving him what he wants. There's really no reason for him to make an effort to treat you well. He can sleep with you for no effort at all. I have to ask the same thing Veronica asked. Why? Why are you settling for this?

Last edited by cookiepls; 08-10-2006 at 12:18 PM.

 
Old 08-10-2006, 12:20 PM   #10
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Quote:
Originally Posted by cookiepls
So he made you feel things that you never thought were possible. That was then. Now what are you feeling? Like crap? Insecurity? Heartbreak? Distrust? Now he's using another woman who will inevitably be hurt by him too. He's using her just like he's using you. He's got it made since you're both giving him what he wants. There's really no reason for him to make an effort to treat you well. He can sleep with you for no effort at all. I have to ask the same thing Veronica asked. Why? Why are you settling for this?
Because I'm outta my freaking mind lol. lol seriously I don't know. I just wish he was good all the time, because when he is good, it's so good. I haven't talked to him since last weekend. That's why I'm talking to you guys.. I want to continue to not talk to him. Do you guys think the good way he is treating her right now, will end up the same way he did to me. If I can get him and her out of my head, I will be doing so much better.

 
Old 08-10-2006, 12:22 PM   #11
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

What you may have had with this guy is gone. Stop living on what was, and make up your mind that you deserve more than someone else's scraps.

 
Old 08-10-2006, 12:23 PM   #12
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

I think you and I were posting at the same time. LOL
Yeah, I think she'll end up in the same position as you. Hell, she already is in a way. He's still sleeping with you so that means he messing around on her too.

It's just a matter of time before he loses respect for her too.

Last edited by cookiepls; 08-10-2006 at 12:24 PM.

 
Old 08-10-2006, 01:30 PM   #13
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

The only way you will get rid of that feeling in the pit of your stomach is time and distance. No more communication at all. That truly is the key. I just got out of a six year relationship six months ago so I know what you are going through. It does get easier with time. I actually started dating again. Honestly, things will get better, but the only person who can make that happen is you. Start living for yourself and realize you deserve so much better. For all you know you could be missing mister right at this very moment because you are dwelling on your ex. Take this time to focus on yourself. Like one of the other posters said focus on the bad things he did and the things you didn't like in him. Believe me when I say the pain will go away you just have to ride it out and be strong. This will pass.

 
Old 08-10-2006, 02:36 PM   #14
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Thanks, Can I ask..is your pain gone? I remember your story from long ago and I felt so bad for you. Everything ok now?

Last edited by Administrator; 08-08-2010 at 01:43 PM.

 
Old 08-11-2006, 06:22 AM   #15
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Re: How do you get rid of that disgusting feeling in the pit of your stomach??

Quote:
Originally Posted by skittley80
Thanks Kerry, Can I ask..is your pain gone? I remember your story from long ago and I felt so bad for you. Everything ok now?
I would have to say the pain of the loss is gone, but the anger surrounding it all isn't. That is going to take quite some time for me. That is just the type of person I am though. Things are going really well for me. Like I said I have started entering the dating scene again. Don't worry the pain will pass. What helped for me was to stay engaged and to bask in the immense freedom I had again and to focus on the negative in him. Use this as a learning experience. If I can move on after a six year relationship which I believed would end in marriage you can move on as well. Just allow yourself the time to heal. I'm always here if you need someone to talk to. And thanks for asking how I am doing.

 
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