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Old 08-24-2006, 09:07 AM   #1
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Question BF doesn't want it

I have been with my BF for 6 years and he never want to do it. I have already been down a list of about 1000 things it could be, but NONE of them apply. I have even asked if maybe something medically is wrong and he says no to that too. I just don't get it, and it is getting to the point where I soak up all male attention I can get elsehwhere. I have not and would not cheat, but I feel harmless flirting is all I have to get by these days, and I am only 25. My BF is 26. Does any other woman out there have a guy like this? And if so, could you shed any light? Is it wrong to enjoy attention from other guys when you are not getting it at home?

 
Old 08-24-2006, 04:53 PM   #2
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Re: BF doesn't want it

So why do you stay with someone that doesn't want to have sex with you? The only light I can shed is what happened in my BF's past relationship with a woman that he lived with for 12 years that would never have sex with him...he kept on staying with her...didn't want to leave her high and dry I guess but when the truth finally came out, she was having an affair with an EX of her's that whole entire time and the reason she didn't want to have sex is because she was in love and having sex with that other guy. My huge question to him that he really can't figure out himself is why in the hell would someone stay with a person that didn't want them to touch them? Weird!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wouldn't expect him to stay with me if I showed him no affection for pete's sake!
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Old 08-24-2006, 08:18 PM   #3
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Re: BF doesn't want it

Do you do other stuff at least? I mean, everything but sex? Is he still a virgin? If not.. then maybe a big red flag. If so, then maybe he just wants to wait? You're saying that he gives no explanations at all?? Very very strange!

 
Old 08-24-2006, 10:18 PM   #4
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Re: BF doesn't want it

yeah, why have you put up with it for 6 years?
are you sure he's your boyfriend? maybe he's your friend or your roommate and you've misjudged the relationship?
maybe he's gay and you're his "beard"
whatever it is, it's not a healthy relationship......what are his reasons?

 
Old 08-25-2006, 03:54 AM   #5
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Re: BF doesn't want it

I'm sorry, but it isn't normal for a 26 year old man to not want sex. Either there is something wrong medically or he is depressed - assuming he isn't gay or having an affair. Either way, it is ONE of those b/c going without sex at tht age isn't normal behavior.

 
Old 08-25-2006, 04:55 AM   #6
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Re: BF doesn't want it

Hmmm. Platonic love with a 26 year old male.
I think you had better back track and double check that list of 1000 things that didn't apply. I'll bet you got more than a few wrong answers on them.

But frankly, it doesn't really matter why. If he is not providing what you want and need, just move on. Gosh, 6 years is a long time for improvements that never came.

How many more years are you willing to spend or waste?

 
Old 08-25-2006, 05:08 PM   #7
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Re: BF doesn't want it

Hi,

I had to respond here. Have you asked him if he is A SEXUAL, meaning someone who doesen't need, desire, or want sex!

These types of people don't choose to be this way, anymore than someone who is straight or gay! to them, the way they feel is normal.

These people do still fall in love, have emotions, also some if not all still like affection, but just do not have the desire or need to carry the affection onto sex!

If this guy is A SEXUAL, than he should already know he is, I am assuming that because you have stayed, he probably feels you have accepted him for how he is, without him having to announce his sexuality.

If he is A SEXUAL, then he probably can't understand or identify with your need for sex.

This situation after six years probably won't change, as if he had some problem with sex, if he missed having a sexual relationship, he would seek help.

I feel sad for you here, and I think maybe at your young age, you should start to think realistically about your future! You shouldn't feel guilty for wanting what afterall is very normal.

Best of luck

 
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