I used to be really bad with women, so it's safe to say I've only ever had 1 girlfriend in my life (I'm 21). And it was many many years ago and lasted only a few weeks. Since then, there have been dates here and there, but never a relationship again. I'm more comfortable with women now and the girl I'm gaming now brought up some relationship questions the other day. I really should have prepared for this, but didn't. She asked when my last girlfriend was, and i just blurted out that it was 6 months ago. I'm pretty sure she believed me at the time, but I think she is starting to figure out that I haven't been involved in relationships before. She tells me a lot about hers, but I never say anythin on the topic, so she must be catching on.
She's guaranteed to ask me more. I've learnt to divert certain questions (i.e. how many girls have you been with) in fun ways to keep girls guessing. I can't divert them all; it'll look as if i'm not opening up to her at all. How can I hide the past or at least make it look better than it is? If you guys are gonna tell me to just be honest with her, she'll know that I just lied to her about my so-called gf 6 months ago...how can I handle that one? What if I tell her that 6months ago was actually my last date (which is true).
Since she is not my girlfriend now, i'm bound to lose value if she finds out about my past. Please help me guys. Thanks.
I'd suggest saying that your last date was 6 months ago, that you dated the girl for a little while but there was not enough chemistry (or something else generic to that effect.) You don't have to come out and say you lied.
If she wants to know how many girls you've slept with, again don't lie. It's okay to say something like, "I'm waiting until I'm in a relationship where it definitely feels right... just haven't found that yet."
There are a lot of women out there who appreciate a man who is not promiscuous. You are only 21 yrs old - you shouldn't really have a long list! I can see if you were 45 and never had a girlfriend then it would seem odd but you are pretty young!
Never start a relationship with lies as then she won't believe you in the future and that could definitely ruin it before it starts.
Just tell her that you are looking for certain qualities in a lady that you have not found until you met her. Tell her you had dated but were not in a serious relationship. You can say it was a relationship but not what you would consider a serious one.
I personally know a really great guy who is a friend of mine that has never had alot of serious relationships - he has had relationships but only 1 serious one as he just has not found the girl he wants and will not settle for less. And believe me he is not a loser, he is good looking, a musician, sweet, etc. and girls are always after him.
I still don't like the idea of telling her that I have only had 1 girlfriend. I don't mind the fact that I've never had a serious girlfriend, but it would be much more respectable if I at least have had a few girlfriends in my life. If I've had girlfriends in the past, but not any serious ones, I could definetly use the "i haven't found the girl with that perfect chemistryto get serious with". I can't use that line in my situation. If she were my girlfriend now, then I'd be much more comfortable to tell her about the past. But right now, at this stage in the relationship, I'm too embarrassed to do it.
She is definetly starting to put the pieces together though. She talks about her past a lot, but I never say anything...of course cause theres nothing to say. She is also only the 2nd girl i've ever kissed; but the 1st one in many many years. Today, she told me that I shake when I kiss (even on the short closed lips ones)and that I must be nervous. I don't feel nervous at all, but I must be if I'm shaking. This is definetly going to make me even more nervous now.
If I've had girlfriends in the past, but not any serious ones, I could definetly use the "i haven't found the girl with that perfect chemistryto get serious with".
I wouldn't use that line regardless of your situation. It's very cliche and transparent - I think most people know it equivalates to "I don't have much past experience."
I'm with the others - be honest or tell her you were taught not to bring past relationships into the current.