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Old 09-06-2006, 07:56 PM   #1
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Oregon
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HannaJane HB User
An old, ex boyfriend

I'm a newbie here.

Hello everybody.

I have a question that's been in the back of my mind.

I was going out with this one guy a long time ago. We had so much fun when we were going out. He was separated at the time and according to him, his wife is a b***h. I didn't have an opinion about his wife because I didn't know the woman. Our relationship blossomed and we both fell in love. But in the back of my mind at the time, the thought of his family and him not really being divorced and still married, was bothering me. So I told him about this issue with me. I brought up the subject of his kids (I didn't have any at that time) and I told him the right thing to do is to go back to his family even though we were in love and we were having so much fun. And to top it off, we got along so well. He was living apart from his family at the time and no, he didn't leave them because of me. I came into the picture 9 months after he'd move out of his house. He had his own home. We were not living together, which is another no-no for me. He eventually went back after we'd talked about doing the right thing, as painful as it was. We were both so in love (I think I already said that ) but he has his responsibilities of raising his kids who were pretty young at that time. When we parted, we promised to go on with our lives and not to have any contact with each other because it would just prolong the pain that we were feeling at the time.

Since then, I'd married and divorced in which resulted in having a child. I thought about him once in a while, and I'm sure I'd crossed his mind too.
The other day, I was reading the newspaper and saw his name. He has a very unique last name. I read that he's running for office locally and even went to his website. I saw pictures of his family and he looks happy. I do pray that he is. He has his faults, but deep down inside, he's a good man and I wish nothing but good things for him. I'm still divorced and unattached and my ex-husband and I are in good terms for the sake of our daughter. It is not her fault that he and I divorced and we don't want to make her life any harder than it is. Back to my ex-boyfriend, I showed my co-wroker his website and she suggested that I should contribute to his campaign! I didn't think it's a good idea because he may think I still carry a torch for him. I'm over him, but of course, we all reminisce about the good times. But she said, I don't think he'd receive the message that way, she thinks he'd be happy to receive any amount of money from anybody. But this money is coming from someone he was in love with. As much as I want to support him, I don't want to send the wrong message.

What do you suggest I should do? I do want to contribute, but I also don't want to send him the wrong messege.

Any suggestions/advice would be greatly appreciated.

Last edited by HannaJane; 09-06-2006 at 08:01 PM.

 
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Old 09-07-2006, 06:06 AM   #2
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Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Lagos, Nigeria
Posts: 176
minijumbofly HB User
Re: An old, ex boyfriend

This is a little mixed up here.

I'm hoping that if you send him money to support his campaign, it would be because you want him to be the voice of the people and not because of nastalgia. If so, there are a ton of ways to send money anonymously.

Otherwise, you are kidding yourself about being over him. And any contact can potentially stir up the peace and balance existing now. He is with family now and if you do wish him all the best, just let him be.

Last, sorry, but I'm just biased against politicians. Most never take a stand on anything and they are full of compromises at best.

 
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