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Old 09-18-2006, 08:15 AM   #1
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BluEyez1031 HB User
Personal insecurities

Hi everyone. My boyfriend and I have been dating for about a year and a half. I love our relationship and am very much in love with him.
He REALLY likes women who have a large behind....and I don't. I have been really insecure about this throughout our relationship, even though we have had countless talks about how he loves my butt, and that he wouldn't be dating me if it was a problem with him. I know that it shouldn't be a big deal, and that no one can be their significant other's absolute perfect ideal, but every once in a while I still find myself feeling insecure about it. I know he's getting tired of having to reassure me. I feel so silly that I even let it bother me.
Any advice on what I should do? I know it's a case of me needing to become more self-confident about it...but I'm not sure what I should be doing. I feel pretty embarrassed and immature even having to post about this, but I'm hoping someone else will have some insight.

 
Old 09-18-2006, 11:54 AM   #2
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Location: St. Paul, Minnesota
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minnesotagirl HB User
Re: Personal insecurities

Well, you have to love yourself before you can love anyone else. Once you accept yourself for who you are, like your boyfriend has, then your insecurities will fade away. There's no magic secret to learning how to love yourself, you just have to find it inside of you and accept who you are. If you continue to ask for reassurance, your boyfriend may get tired of it and leave. I'm sure your boyfriend has some faults too, and you don't care about those faults, so he probably feels that same way about your faults. Plus, having a smaller backside isn't really much of a fault! You've had countless discussions with him about it already -- If he didn't like it, he'd probably tell you to work out or eat more to make it larger. But, he doesn't. He accepts you and so you should accept you.

 
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Old 09-18-2006, 04:18 PM   #3
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Shorty39 HB User
Re: Personal insecurities

I understand how you feel. Don't know what you can do about it really. I am exactly the opposite. I have a large round one. I get self consious of mine because I kinda just always sticks out. I can't hide it. It's like a sore thumb.
LOL LOL My husband has always loved it and I always get compliments but I would rather not be noticed by my butt when I walk in a room. It isn't always funny when you walk in a room and thats what they are looking at whether it is admired or jealous. Some even come up and make remarks. Well I have a face and would like to be know by my personality and face instead of big butt. So if we were given a choice I'd gladly trade. LOL

 
Old 09-18-2006, 06:25 PM   #4
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punkybear HB User
Re: Personal insecurities

Think of it this way: If you are honest with yourself, is he physically perfect? There's not even one teeny-tiny thing about him that you would prefer were different physically? He couldn't have bigger arms or a six-pack? My point is, you love him so much you don't dwell on those things. My fiance's ex had huge boobs and a figure to die for and I don't have big boobs and I dwell on this sometimes, used to a lot, and I finally started looking at it that way. One day I even mentioned it and he looked at me like I was crazy and said "you're everything I have ever wanted in a girl." He has a little bit of a belly these days lol but I certainly don't look at him differently. I barely noticed until he pointed it out. Love is blind, honey, it is true what they say. I doubt he even thinks about it, really. Nobody is physically perfect. I'm sure there are things about you that drive him crazy (in a good way) and that is all he dwells on.

Last edited by punkybear; 09-18-2006 at 06:38 PM.

 
Old 09-19-2006, 05:36 AM   #5
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BluEyez1031 HB User
Re: Personal insecurities

Hehe thanks for the advice Shockwave!! It made me smile. I definitely don't wear clothes to hide it, but I'll try telling myself that I love my butt every day

 
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