Re: help me
Maybe she thought that you took the loss of the baby too casually. Where you upset? Did you cry in front of her? Did you let her know that you were hurting too? Or did you just brush over it like it was no big deal, or even try to “cheer” her up about the miscarriage? Was she upset and crying after the miscarriage?
I ask because when I miscarried my first baby I cried for days if not weeks. I was very upset, very depressed and very sad. My ex-husband however showed no emotion at the loss at all. He never cried, never said he was sorry – nothing. The Dr. made the comment that it was probably for the best because a miscarried baby sometimes has a development problem and that’s why they miscarry. (My baby was later checked and showed no abnormality – so who really knows why I miscarried.) But, my ex made a point to tell everyone “it was for the best”. Every time he said it I hated him a little more. To me he sounded relieved or happy that the baby was gone. I would have left him in a minute if I had had any kind of help or encouragement. My parents lived over 600 miles away and my mother said it would be too embarrassing if I came back home after being married less than 2 years, and that I wanted to get married and this was part of marriage – that’s how men are, etc. - no sympathy here. I had no one else to turn to. Keep in mind this was over 35 years ago and things were different for women then. I stayed, but I never felt the same about him after that miscarriage, and I never believed he had feelings for me or our 2 future children. This turned out to be true in the end, and I finally divorced him.