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Old 09-28-2006, 02:24 PM   #1
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: sacramento
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aj76 HB User
I need advice

I have been with my significant other for about 1yr and 3 months now and things are getting a little rocky.

i recently started working on myself on about my insecurities and so far its going well and it is working for the both of us. This man has been the most understanding loving man. He has been patient with my nsecurities. I do trust him and sometime i feel as if he was cheating on me. It all started when i saw an email regarding personals at yahoo. this is actually when we first moved in together so i cannot really judge him on that because we all know that we do go into chat rooms at one point when we were single. But we got that situated.

But my problem is thati feel like he does not appreciate the things i do for him.

He broke his 16 year sobriety and started drinking again ever since he lost his job and it has been 6 months now. he said that he was not going to drink again and i have noticed that he has not been drinking that much anymore. i dont really understand what alcoholism is so i ignore that situation but i recently confronted him about his drinking and hs partying. When he drinks he gets rude and he starts inviting people over and we have a small place and i work and he knows that i hate noise. noise bugs me when im trying to go to sleep and have to work the next day, we also have corrected this and he's been sensitive to my schedule

1 scenario is that he has back problems and he recently went to e.r. for it. i have been there for this man whenever he needs my assistance. vice versa, he is there for me too. Recently, he lost his keys and i have been there to take him to work, here and there. And yes we are both there for each other but last night i was a little late to get him to the e.r. because i was out with my sister for lunch and took the kids out to the playground. I get a call from him stating that he was going to the er. I wanted to go pick him up so bad but it took a little while to get the kids ready and go home. So i got to the e.r. and he was just not in a mood. He did not tell me that he was mad. So anyway now it seems like the old ways again, he's ignoring me, does not call me as much, invites his friends over....basically doing the things that he knows will turn me into a basket case.....is this my fault, what should i do"? does my man appreciate me?

Last edited by aj76; 09-28-2006 at 03:08 PM.

 
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Old 09-29-2006, 12:37 PM   #2
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Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: UK
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messee84 HB User
Re: I need advice

Wow sounds like there are a lot of different issues here...I think I would tell him you aren't feeling appreciated as you are trying your best to be there for him but you have other commitments sometimes. As for his drinking I think most of the problems are coming from that and I think it's important to find out what triggered him to start drinking again after so long sober. What encouraged him to stop drinking in the first place? Maybe if you uncover these things you can start working together on tackling the drink problem.

 
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