gaylad - just a thought, but he ended things with you, right? he didn't do the decent thing and speak to you about why he wanted out of the relationship, which being 3 years is a long time. He took the easy way out and left, without reason.
He has a new guy now, and obviously they will chat about their last partner. I personally think that maybe he didn't want to tell his new guy how he just got up and left you, because that would make him look bad in his new boyfriends eyes. So maybe he has put you in a negative light, to make him leaving you look justified! He may realise that telling this new guy the truth, may make his new boyfreind feel uncertain of him, and expect that he may do the same.
That could be the case. If this is the case, then it has backfired on him, cause he probably didn't expect his now boyfriend to tell you what he told him in confidence.
Your better off out of it. good luck in finding someone nice