I'm more confused after reading your 2nd post, but to summarize it's basically:
1. You married someone that you never loved or cared about.
2. You actually started a family with someone that you don't care about.
3. Now you want to know what should you do?
What do you think? Obviously you've invested something into this relationship (as to what? who knows, but obviously it's not your feelings) because you wouldn't be feeling angry and heartbroken now. Although I do wonder what you're heartbroken about if your heart was never involved in this relationship. Are you scared that outside of her you will end up alone? That is no reason to stay with someone.
You've got some choices here:
1. Tough it out and seek the help of marriage couselor if you think it's worth saving. Let the expert help you deal with this relationship.
2. Leave the relationship and find someone you actually care about. I also suggest you talk to a couselor on your own because you obviously have some self-esteem problem if you think "no one want anything to do with you."
Don't let your kids be the deciding factor. From the way you describe the relationship it does not sound like a health one and I don't think it will create a loving environment for your kids to grow up in.
Pro-active starts with making a decision as to how to get out of a tough situation.