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Old 10-11-2006, 07:54 PM   #1
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Saw her driving.....want to send email....should I?

I saw her driving today. It's been 4 months of complete NC from both sides.

But I've felt lately I've hit a wall in "healing".

I want to send her an email just telling her I'm sorry for how I acted, and I'm sorry for the things I said....that I hope she's doing well...etc....

I realize we are both probably better off without each other, and I will say this also in the email just so she understands I'm not trying to rekindle anything.

But I feel I need to get this stuff off my chest to really "let go".

Anyone think I shouldn't?

 
Old 10-11-2006, 09:35 PM   #2
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Re: Saw her driving.....want to send email....should I?

Absolutely NOT! Do NOT email, call, text, snail mail, or any other form of communication! To what end? What do you hope to gain or accomplish? It would do nothing to help either of you move on from what has happened. It's done and overwith, that chapter is now closed, it's time to move on with your life. I'm sure that she has moved on with hers, and she is probably starting to get to a good place right now. For you to just drop in and say something is going to be a setback for her just as much as it is for you.

I broke up with a guy and never wanted to see him again. About a year after zero contact, he sent me a stupid email out of the blue saying that he remembered it was my birthday. I was really upset because I never wanted to hear from him again. I ended up changing my email address and phone number, and I'm happy to say that he doesn't have any way of contacting me.

It's better for both of you if you just let it be. I'm telling you that nothing good will come of you writing her. You'll probably just end up ******* her off.

If you feel compelled to write to her, then go ahead and write a letter, but then do a symbolic ritual where you burn the paper and let that be your closure. I've done it myself for a relationship where I had no closure and it helped a lot. You write every single thing you think you could possibly want to say to her and then you take it outside and burn it in your barbeque grill. It helps to have a little ceremony to make it official and everything, because then you'll really feel like you've given it adequate attention and that it no longer needs to be dwelled upon anymore.

 
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