Ok wow. I am going to ignore the 'skank' comment (this is the 2nd one I heard from you) and answer your question...but seriously JBravo, I would try to put less effort into figuring out your ex and more into changing your attitude on women in general.
The reason why she has this power over you is because you let her. Stop answering her calls. Stop trying to keep contact with her b/c it is obvious you are not over her and until you are you shouldnt talk to her. End of story. Its hard, and I went through it, and I havent found greater emotional pain yet, but you have to do it. Once she realizes she doesnt have all the control (b/c it seems she does at the moment), then the power will be yours.
ps- the playboy bunny costume comment was probably just to get at you, b/c she knows it will.
she likes to push your buttons and you're letting her.
She gets the reaction she wants out of you. Calls you just enough and tells you just enough to drive you insane and to keep you thinking about her. Lucky for her she can read you like a book ...........your reactions to her pathetic attempt of keeping you hanging are making her feel wonderful while making you feel bad.
Have a little respect for yourself, will ya?
Next time she calls either A. Don't answer .....or B. Talk to her briefly if you need the "just hear her voice" fix but don't let her know that you're still weak and spineless.
Good Grief !! I don't mean to come across so "frank", but this has been hurting you for long enough, yet YOU continue to let it happen.
You are doing this to yourself, by allowing her to treat you this way.
Two things .....you can only get beat over the head with the same stick for so long before you finally grab the stick and say enough ....
The only thing worse than being alone is wishing you were alone ......which is exactly where'd you be if you were back with her.
I know you're angry and thats understandable...I was just trying to figure out your definitions of 'wholesome' and 'skank'. You seem to like to categorize women based on a simple action rather than a full analysis.
But whatever. I could go on but lets pay attention the problem at hand. I appreciate your apology. The point here is- yes, I think youre gf is just trying to get to you b/c she knows she can. May I ask how old you both are? It seems she is a pretty immature, or maybe insecure and likes thinking how jealous you are feeling. Why else would she say that to a recent ex? THat is just cruel.
Trust me on this one, I went through a HORRIBLY painful breakup a year ago and I went through this exact thing. The best thing you can do for yourself is stop talking to her and cut her out. It is so hard and it hurts but you will only feel better, gain power, and gain control of this situation once you do it. She has all the control right now, she knows it and you know it, and that is why she can say comments that will get to you like that.
Why do you even need to keep talking to her?
Tell her that you are seeing somebody esle and don't think she should call you. If she is your ex why does it matter what she is wearing if anything.
If you don't communicate with her it will make things better for you.
Ugh, I agree. Stop talking to this girl. Why is she calling you? It makes no sense to me. I would consider yourself lucky for finding out this side of her -- her true side -- before you got anymore serious. GEEEZZ! There are so many single women out there closer to your age who would love to have a boyfriend who cares so deeply.
Do you ever think "I'll never be with a hot girl like her again." I don't know, sorry if I'm way off base here, but just thinking that. I know other guys who've felt that way when they dated some really hot girl. But hey, looks do not matter as much as personality and heart. Oh and being disease-free is a bonus, too, which I'm sure she won't be if she keeps up her act.
I kind of like the idea of telling her that you're seeing someone new and that it is inappropriate for you to keep talking to her. But, that might set off some more fire and drama, so its probably best to just not answer the phone. You have caller ID, right?
Lets just say she has you wrapped around your finger and is throwing you through loops. I'm 18 and I know that she is just playing games with you because she loves the thought of the attention she gets from you. She tells you these things because she knows it gets you mad, which makes her know you want her more.
And she will dress that way because if she seen you and she had them guys hitting on her left and right then she knows you would get jealous...she is controlling your every move and has you right where she wants you. Plus that statement about the beach and her thinking she was fat, she most likely just wants you to tell her how good she looks...come on she was probably soaking in the sun in a tiny bikini enjoying the men looking at her...did you think about that one? But lets just say the more and more you talk to her, the worse and worse she will get. Plus, if she was a wholesome girl she wouldn't be doing this to you...so you are probably just seeing the real side of her, so either suck it up and get used to it or foget about her and move on...your 30, find a sweet girl who knows what she does and doesn't want. one who is mature and won't play with your head like this one...the girl you are having problems with is considered a tease, and a big one at that.
There is no need or reason for you to be talking to her. I know age is just a number, but I had no idea you were 30. Holy bejeebus, I thought you were 18-20. You definetly don't need this kind of drama. It really is no wonder you have the opinions you do about women when it is THIS kind of woman you obsess over. Someone who is painfully insecure and so self-absorbed that all she really cares about is knowing that she has you (and everyone else) going crazy over her. Even I hate women like that. Not everyone is like that.
I agree that perhaps you need someone closer to your age, a woman who is more mature and secure and not into silly, tiresome games. You'd probably be a lot happier.
The grass is always greener on the other side...until you get closer and see that it's astroturf~
I don't even know why you bother posting here, Bravo. You never take any of the great advice that has been given to you here - ever, and you keep feeling miserable. Small wonder.
I don't know what else to tell you. It's all been said to you five hundred times already. If you ever have any contact with her again, then you're a fool. And you're letting her do this to you. What exactly does that say about you? I think you need to explore that answer carefully and start making some serious changes in your life about whom you choose to allow access to your life from now on.