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-   -   how to build trust/stop worrying!! THE LOOP AT THE END!! (http://www.healthboards.com/boards/relationship-health/443497-how-build-trust-stop-worrying-loop-end.html)

quamen 11-03-2006 09:05 PM

how to build trust/stop worrying!! THE LOOP AT THE END!!
 
I was in my last relationship for over 1 year,and my ex went to a party and cheated on me with her ex. She told me right away,and she was devastated and i was heart broken. After that incident, it has been very hard for me to trust someone. While im older 24 and my current gf is turning 20, i find it is hard for me to trust her. I have a couple simlpe issues that bother me,but she seems or says she is being honest. She does have alot of guy friends which i dont mind, but her ex bf called her a few times today. She didnt pick it up when i was with her,but when i was out of the vehicle she told me he called her again and she talked to him and it was about really nothing from what she says. I did get upset,because she says the last time he called her was over 1 month ago,but i find that so hard to believe.

he called over 1 month ago,but called her like 3-4 times when she was with me today. She says she would never cheat on me or whatever,but this just seems shady. 2. Sex. Even though we have been dating only about 3 months, in the past she says she had alot of sex with her ex about 1-2 times a day or whatever,but i guess she lost her drive. We only have sex about 1-2 times a month it seems. 3. Alot of times she says things that seem so untrue,but then later tells me she doesnt know why she said it. Tommorow their is this party and she wanted to go, then she didnt,she she did. It seemed when i wanted to join her she no longer wanted to go. Anyways she said a few things. I dont want to drink anymore, which i know is a lie. 2. She feels uncomfortable even though she knows many of those people,and has stayed at previous parties where she knew NO ONE. 3. She might be tired after she gets out of work, but she only works like 5 hours,and stays up every night till like 2 am or later. I confronted her about it,and now she seems she wants to go,but it just seemed shady.

The whole thing that throws me threw a loop is that she would spend every minute of her life with me if she wanted. No matter what im doing, going to work (i work on the road), relaxing at home, going out, doing homework/paperwork she wants to be with me no matter how boring or how exciting it is. This is what really confuses me and kinda tells me maybe i just worry and look to much into things since she always wants to be with me.

kitkat77 11-03-2006 10:49 PM

Re: how to build trust/stop worrying!! THE LOOP AT THE END!!
 
Hmmm... Does she want to be with you because she wants to spend time with you, or because she wants to make sure that you don't catch her cheating?

I'd go with your gut instincts on this one. The [U]whole thing[/U] is shady, including the wanting to spend every moment with you. It positively reeks of her still seeing her ex behind your back. Sorry dude.

quamen 11-04-2006 02:18 AM

Re: how to build trust/stop worrying!! THE LOOP AT THE END!!
 
I have no clue really on what she wants to do, but i do know what she tells me. SHe just tells me she loves spending time with me and everything, so that is why she likes to be around me. I just get really worried about the ex thing, especially since he called yesterday her face got so red when he called the 2nd time for some reason, i was pretty upset. My gut instinct since the begining was that it seems shady about many things,but she keeps telling me she wouldnt do any of that stuff ever to me, so i have no clue im just confused.


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