I was in class today and a girl brought her three kids with her. This class is small, about 20 students. Her kids were pretty quiet for the most part but the fact that they were there at all distracted the class. In fact, one student had to stand during class because her kids were using three seats.
Since they were not loud, the professor didnt say anything to her about it. As a result, I feel she will think its ok to bring her kids to every class.
While I understand shes young and has three kids, I think its inappropriate to bring her kids to class, especially a small class in a small room. I think she should have made sure before enrolling in the course to make sure her kids could be watched. Her kids were playing and even though they werent loud, as said just the fact that they were there distracted the class.
I guess at the moment its not a huge deal but as I already said Im sure she will start doing it on a regular basis now. I just hope this was a one time thing.
For one thing, how are you "SURE" she's going to bring her kids on a regular basis? How do you know she didn't have to bring them today because of a family emergency, such as someone in her family dying or being in the hospital? Perhaps her mother was supposed to watch them but she had a heart attack. Wouldn't you feel a little bit bad for her and be able to empathize with her if that were the case? Obviously she is a mom trying to improve her education, which is the best thing she could do for her children.
If the kids weren't bothering anyone, and especially if this is a one time occurance, I don't see why you need to be so upset about it.
Are you sure you don't have other issues here? Perhaps you have a poor judgement of this woman overall?
It is usually up to individual professors to set rules and expectations for their classes, along with the University. If there's a specific rule she's violating, I suppose you should bring that up if you really want to complain.
Otherwise I wouldn't say anything about this, but then again, I'm a nice person in general and can empathize with others, especially if they aren't harming me personally!
I think that if she did bring her children to class everyday it would create a distraction and especially if they are taking up room that the students need. She should find a sitter to watch her kids and if not I'm sure there is a daycare around somewhere.
When my first son was an infant there were times that I had to take him to class because my husband couldnt watch him and I refused to put him in daycare. It happens more than you think whether it be single moms or married moms.
When I did it I made sure I told my teachers I might have to bring my son due to his father being military and that job comes first no matter what. Most were fine with it. I did have one teacher who said he was fine with it until I actually had to do it. My son actually slept through his class but on the way out the door he pulled me aside and told me he never wanted me to do that to his class again. I told him that I had warned him it could happen and that fine it wouldnt happen again because I was going to immediately drop his class.
There is no telling why she may had to bring her children since you dont know it might be better just to let it go. You might want to get use to it since more and more parents are furthering their education and stuff happens that they cant help.
DS 13 yr
DS 8 yr (3+ yrs ttc)
TTC #3 since 01/02
My neighbour is planning to take her kids to school on a regular basis and keep them in an empty room near her classroom, they will have some activities. She can't afford babysitting.
I had coworker who brought her kid to work once and everybody was negative about it and remembered it as long as she worked there.
Overall I don't think its right, although I can understand how hard it is and that I was blessed with help not everybody have.
If somebody have to stay during the class it is especially wrong.
I personally wouldn't stick out and report it, it is up to professor.
BYW I have to take online class 'cause I don't have help with kid and if pr. is good it may be equivalent to face one.
I was just asking based on the fact if she started to bring them to every class. As I said, its not a huge issue right now, I feel it will become one thats all.
The class is structured like this: We have class twice a week, one of the classes has a three hour lab session right after the regular class. So I guess you could say we have three classes. On the lab day, If she brings her kids to class, I know she will have a confrontation with the professor because the university is very strict about the lab rules. During a lab (physiology), everyone has to wear pants and if you dont you have to leave. So bringing her kids would then be now allowed during the lab sessions Im assuming.
I admit I probably should have waited to post this until after she started doing this on a regular basis but I just thought it would turn into an everyday thing.
Let me rephrase, if she started bringing them to every class and even to the lab sessions, is that inappropriate?
Well, with the nuclear family changing so drastically, I think what is appropriate is also changing drastically. I do agree that it is not appropriate for an enrolled student who paid money to be in the class (I'm assuming this is college and not high school?) has to stand so her kids can come in and sit. It might have been nice if the teacher tried to hunt down another chair from another classroom or something. but in this day and age, there are many single young mothers struggling hard to make ends meet, and make a better life for themselves and their kids. No doubt she brought them with her because she couldn't not afford or find a babysitter and there was no one she could leave them with and nothing else she could do. I think it's probably harder than anyone can imagine being a single mom, and there are more and more of them every day. Look at it this way, if she were forced to keep her kids away and were prohibited from bringing them to class, she may have no other alternative than to drop out, not get an education, not get a better job, and end up on welfare or some kind of assistance instead of getting a good job and providing better for her kids. You may ask, then why have kids if you're too young and don't have your education or your career established yet? Well, people have sex these days, very very few people practice abstinence these days, and there is no 100% effective form of birth control, and therefore, surprises happen, and you have to make the best of it. If the majority of the class gets together and decides it's too much of a distraction, then perhaps the matter can be taken up with the teacher or the faculty of the school, but I'd say unless it's stopping the vast majority of people in the class from learning the matieral and getting what they came to school for, then you may have to roll with it. I remember when I went to community college to get my paralegal certificate, a woman brought her kid every now and again, and while it was a minor distraction, we all pretty much understood that she probably didn't have a choice, and hey, we all need to be cut a break every once in a while.
The way I look at it - it is not appropriate to take kids in class. If it is one time thing I let it go, she may get in tuff cituation, when babysitter let her down and she didn't have a choice.
If she starts doing it on a regulat basis than it should be stopped.
I was right. I just got back from class- she brought her kids again. The teacher made her leave because we were doing the lab. She was very upset about it.
I actually felt really bad for the professor because she gave him a hard time about it. She accused him of making her leave because he was racist (shes black). I guess she felt she was immune from all the rules because she has kids. I mean the professor has kicked kids out of the lab who were not wearing pants. We are dissecting animals so I dont see how she thought she could get away with having her kids there.
Not only that, if the professor let her kids stay in there during the lab and they got hurt, he would probably loose his job.
I realized just now that because she couldnt perform the lab today, she will not be able to write a very big report on it. The report is 40% of our final grades so she might have to drop the course.
id feel bad for her, not the professor. im sure he took it like a man, enforced the rules like a good professor. i feel for the woman. yeh it aint right to have kids in class, but i feel for her. awww poor women. gotta be tough. i hope she doesnt drop out. shame she didnt have anyone to look after her kids, then she could get on with her studies.
being dropped off the course she wont bother you anymore.
plus im quite unsure that this thread has anything to do with relationships? but anyway, i do not wish to start a discussion on that.
Last edited by apple_juice; 02-08-2007 at 09:14 AM.
I dont want to sound like a cold hearted guy here but she should not assume she can bring her kids to labs. Not only that, before the lab we had our regular lecture, one kid had to stand again because her kids were taking up the seats.
The rules are rules. I dont think him enforcing them is a cold hearted thing. Again, he was not targeting her or anything, he has kicked kids out for remedial things.