An ex wifes point of view here. Dont run away now!
Ok I left my husband when our son was just 7months old. Long story! We went through too much bs with lawyers and wound up at a duncan donuts one night with coffee in a parking lot sorting out what we wanted for our divorce. Took an hour and half. He of course didnt like who i was dating but he never meddled. I think that was mainly due to the fact that at that time that boyfriend wouldnt tolerate any bs from his as well. But my ex had a great girlfriend and we hit it off, it was too bad that they didnt in the end. There are a few things you need to make sure of and I know this might be too little to late but I have to say it.....
Make sure you are no longer in love with your ex, being apart is really what you want and that is that. And I mean both ways, if she was meddling was it because she is witch or because she wants you back. Ok that being said THEN you need to make sure your arrangements for your kids are straight between the two of you. Remember that your kids come before any woman or man in her case. You and your ex MUST be friends in order to have those kids grow up in any good way. Laugh together talk to eachother and when you are in disagreement talk it out and dont get pissy in front of those kids because let me tell ya they will use that against both of you. You need to sit with ex and make sure she knows that who ever you are going out with that she does not teach those kids that it's ok to talk about anyone badly.
Ok now for your girlfriend; does she like the kids? does she play with them? Do you see her as a mother herself? Do you see her having kids or just taking care of yours? Why does she not like your ex, is it becuase ex was being rude in the beginning of the relationship; if that is all then she needs to get over it. Your kids arent going anywhere thus neither is she so girlfriend needs to smarten up. If you have broken up with girlfriend before about this and she says she will change!!!!!! You need to smarten up cuz SHE WONT! You might think you love her but look at it yes the whole picture! Do you see her wanting to share 1/2 siblings with your ex? Think about that for a minute. What if you are done with kids and she wants them but doesnt want your other kids around on the weekends because it will be so hard for her to take care of all of them.
Listen I am a very strong woman, I learned to be a very "i dont give a damn" kind of person. So if i was dating someone and his ex was being rude and it stopped then I get over it. Also I would actually have confronted her myself and told her that that wont be happening and I wouldnt care if she had your kids or not, i wont be disrespected. Because no matter if she is your ex or not disrespect is disrepect and your ex would have either shut her mouth or gotten upset and boooo hoooo'd but it would have been over. Sooooo do you want a woman who revolves your life around her anger at your ex or do you want a woman who will look and laugh if ex tries to get in yoru way.? Your choice.
By the way the boyfriend who told my ex he wouldnt be pushed around I married! Have 3 more kids too boot!
First and foremost have a good relationship with your ex because you will see her till the day you die becuase of your kids! Girlfreinds may come and go untill you find the right one but ex will always be there. a healthy relationship with her is worth 100 times more than any one girlfriend. You can ask my son who will be 12 years old. He couldnt ask for more that my ex and i are freinds and that my 2nd husband whom my son thinks of as a father as well is also kind to my ex. I would never speak ill ever about my ex in front of my son, it was always a rule and always will be.