Approaching Women - Relationship Health Message Board

falcone · 07-27-2007, 02:35 PM

Any tips on approaching women in bars and clubs etc? I would consider myself confident around women once we have started chatting but I am petrified of initial contact/rejection.

Larrylou'smom · 07-27-2007, 10:20 PM

Well, my fist bit of advice is, DO NOT GET DRUNK!! Some guys think they are more confident, more assertive and more attractive after they've had a few, but really, they're just more sweaty and more obnoxious. When a guy approaches me drunk, it's the biggest turn off in the world.

I think if it's a club or bar where there's dancing, why not just ask a young lady if she'd care to dance? You could make eye contact, smile, say hi, ask if she's having a good time, if it's a bunch of girls, ask how they're all doing tonight, etc. and ask one to dance, or I've even seen some guys go up to a table of ladies and ask if anyone would like to dance.

It's one of the hardest things to try to create a relationship from scratch right out of the blue, so I don't blame you for being nervous and unsure on this subject, but confidence is the key. Remember all the good stuff you have to offer a girl and smile and just be willing to show it.

Hope this helps just a little bit.

miyu · 07-27-2007, 11:25 PM

I totally agree, and if your nervous and your hands are sweaty, don’t worry about it, imagine how she would feel suddenly being approached, I mean you could at least prepare yourself, but don’t worry to much a little eye contact can tell you right away there is a connection.

I met my husband at a party. I approached him a few times, chatted a little. But because I thought he was really cute, I really didn’t care what he thought of me, I just liked being around him, so I could look at him and drool more. and I saw him about 3 different times, and chatted a little each time. It must have been fate that we kept seeing each other. Then I asked to dance, and he said sure, before I knew it we were making out. And he couldn’t believe someone like me was so into him. Lol

dammie · 07-28-2007, 08:50 AM

My only tip is don't be cheesy or gross. Most of us don't like dull pick up lines, it makes us feel dirty. We don't want to hear that we have a hot butt, we'd rather hear that we have nice eyes. We also don't want to hear those pick up lines that you see on tv. Be yourself and respectful and you should do fine.