i have been friends with this girl for 8 years. we met in high school. a few years later i met this other girl at a party and we became good friends straight away always hanging out, talking on the phone etc. 7 months later i met this guy who i basically fell in love with. we dated for 6 months and i lost my virginity to him. he broke it off with me and i was devestated. about 6 months after he broke it off with me, my friend that i had known for 7 months went and slept at his house. by this stage i had known her for 2 years. i was angry at her because she knew how much i liked him so i ended being friends with her. she begged to have our friendship back and said she would never talk to him again. i forgave her and introduced her to my friend of eight years. she kept talking to him, wanting to hang out so i dumped her, changed my email and phone number because she wouldnt stop trying to contact me. my friend of 8 years told me that she wouldnt trust someone like that. but all of a sudden my friend of 8 years has decided to become friends with her after knowing how much grief this girl gave me. i feel betrayed. should i feel betrayed? my friend of 8 years went through her own grief with her boyfriend and after they broke it off, i seized all contact with him because im a loyal friend. this girl that went off with the guy i liked goes around saying that i think im better than others, writes stupid comments about me on her profile and my friend of 8 years opinion on this is, well she hasnt ever done anything to me. its like she doesnt care and i dont know if i want to be friends with her anymore. is this worth giving up a friendship for?
this girl who went off with the guy i liked has tried to poach onto a lot of my friends. im just sick of it. her best friend now works with my ex. this situation got so messed up. i want her out of my life, but noone seems to undersand.
Why do you need to have so much control over who your friends see and don't see? I get that the ex situation may have been a little raw after six months, so that could be upsetting, but when all is said and done, it is really nothing do do with you that your friends hang out with your ex or each other. You are just going to lose everybody. All this stuff seems a bit high schoolish to me. Live and let live, enjoy your friends and don't put all these conditions and controls on your friendships. You will be happier. Sera
Shorti,
I understand that you feel betrayed but, are you willing to let 8 years of friendship go to waste because she’s hanging around someone that you don’t like? I was in a similar situation back in high school and sure, I felt betrayed but, sometimes you just have to let things go babe. As you get older you will understand that life gets in your way and you only have limited time to spend with you true friends, (the ones that know you best) and you can’t let little things like this get in your way.
Just like with my situation back in high school, yea she really hurt me but when push comes to shove, you grow and time becomes almost non existent in the real world and you will loose touch with most people. Friendship is a form of a relationship and just like any relationship; you have to fight to keep it alive. So, if you really care for this girl, you will fight to keep her in your life.
I only wish that I had more time to spend with my friends from back in the day, but things change. People grow apart and you have a better understanding and maturity as time speeds by. You have to learn to forgive if you expect to keep anyone in your life. Enjoy your time and use it wisely babe.
Jul
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Time does not heal. It simply provides distraction.
