Ok well I'm not sure how bad this is but.....my bf is about 8 years older than me. I am 20 and he is 28. So the thing is is I have starting seeing porn websites on our computer history like "hot teen girls" and teens from heaven" I know that they arnt under 18...but why does he want to see younger girls? Also there have been a few things I have picked up on in our relationship like how he thought someone was cute a few years ago...but she was like
17ish......Are these things anything to be concerned about? Am I overeacting.
Ok well I'm not sure how bad this is but.....my bf is about 8 years older than me. I am 20 and he is 28. So the thing is is I have starting seeing porn websites on our computer history like "hot teen girls" and teens from heaven" I know that they arnt under 18...but why does he want to see younger girls? Also there have been a few things I have picked up on in our relationship like how he thought someone was cute a few years ago...but she was like
17ish......Are these things anything to be concerned about? Am I overeacting.
Well, as far as the porn thing goes if they are 18 he isn't doing anything LEGALLY wrong. Other than that, yes it is creepy and I don't know of any guys that age that admit to doing that (they could still do it though).
As for the last bit, that is cause for concern. Maybe talk to him about it?
Well you could ask him but he will explain it away and you'll think ...oh ok no big deal. LISTEN TO YOUR FIRST INSTINCT...this will be the rest of you life with him. Unless you approve of porn and very young girls in his/your life then find someone not into deviant behavior.
I would be very worried that he has started to do this because I was getting too old to be attractive to him. Go with your instincts, don't try to explain it away. It is creepy and you don't need this in your life from somebody who is supposed to be committed to you. Sera
Well if he's dating you and you're 20, then it's no big surprise that he likes much younger girls. You're not that many steps away from being a teenager, yourself.
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I would just talk to him about it! If it is bothering you that much, just talk to him. I think many men have that "young" fetish. I dont know that is a tough one! Just try talking to him and hear him out! I mean, he is almost 30 but checking out much younger girls is kinda creepy. Would it bother you as much is they were women his age? Just curious! I didnt know if the thought of porn all together made you uncomfortable or maybe because they were just younger....
I dont find the porn all that bad..I just dont like the fact that he's only interested in "teen" porn. On top of the fact that I have heard a few things throughout our relationship that have made me stop in my tracks and remind him of girls ages!
It would bother me too. When I think of what appeal barely legal girls could have, none of the associations are good ones. I'd question what a guy with that interest wants from a woman, and what his boundaries are. Does he recognize that adolescents are vulnerable and make poor dating options for adults? Is he going to trade you out for someone younger in a few years? Those are the questions I'd be asking.
I would tell him that you find it creepy (or maybe another word) and that it bothers you. See how he reacts to it. That is hard, I can imagine! Let us know
Well, it seems to me that this is just who he is, so I don't really know what talking to him about it would do. He's an adult with a free will and this is obviously what he wants to do. He's not going to stop wanting to do it just because you express a concern about it. He may get better at hiding it from you, but he won't stop wanting to do it, and you can't make him stop being who and what he is just by having a talk with him.
now that you know that he's got a teen girl fetish, the only thing you need to ask yourself is if this is the guy you see yourself with 5 years down the road, that you see being a father to your children, that you really want to be growing old with.
get rid of him....right now he's a perv, but in some years down the line he will be a dirty old man......yuck......
I'd also check the predator list in his town to see if he's on it, just for curiousity, but I'd be gone regardless.
