Past haunts! - Relationship Health Message Board

chevyman · 01-17-2009, 10:11 AM

I think my past maybe haunting me,.
as some of you know I'm in a realtionship with a very nice beautiful woman, things are going pretty good with the excepion she is getting jettery or jelous....she is always asking me why I take so long to go to the store or if I'm gone to long she lets me know about it, I have had past g/f and some of them just can't let sleeping dogs lie....my current g/f knows of this and she brings it up...she says how do I know you was nout out with jennifer?Jennifer and I were dateing for a while but never did have that connection so we parted ways and still remain good friends ..I do talk to her from time to time we we see each other we both still care about each other but just as friends and only in a platonic way.
I can't make my current g/f see this...I don't know what to do...I Love this girl and its bothering me the way she is about my past and my past g/f.

Is it ok to be friends with your ex? and still be a in a loving realtionship with another.
I've talk to my current g/f about all this and she still acusses me and assumming things that I'm out with jennifer when I'm not with her or stay gone to long...just because jenifer and I remain good friends.
what should I do?
I don't want to break-up so I just don't know what to do??

writeleft · 01-17-2009, 03:06 PM

Your past is haunting you...chevyman?

She sounds like she has past demons in the trust department herself. It's almost as if she expects it to be happening, and she is going to make sure she catches you, because her experience may be that "all men do it".

I am another kind of woman, who's experience with men have been positive, and like you...I wouldn't consider these men anything less than old friends whom I still value.

I hate to tell you this, but I would call this a little red flag on a long term relationship.

writeleft

BeaTrade · 01-17-2009, 03:20 PM

You can have all the Exes you want calling you all day/night long...just don't expect a woman to be OK with that! Personally I don't like baggage! I want a relationship with a man that want to be with me...not some other woman/women! And what are you doing when you time cannot be accounted for? If you are talking and going on with your EX GFs and then your are mysteriously MIA for a couple hours...what's she supposed to think? I mean if she has a brain and thinks for herself? Personally I think people deserve better than deception and sneaking! Like I said, you're business is your business but don't expect a woman to be OK with it! And if you find one...goody for you! Better hang on to that one in a million woman!

Another question...have you been sneaking around(with Exes) and got caught? Is that really why she's not trusting you? I used to trust my husband 110% until I caught him sneaking around...needless to say that trust is totally gone right now!!!!!

Redneon82 · 01-17-2009, 03:30 PM

Just reverse the situatuon. I remember that you posted that she'd come home one night late before you were dating, and, in all honesty, you were jealous and concerned. How would you feel if she were talking to and spending time with an ex? I think you mentioned that it bothers you when she talks about her husband who passed away...so you have to expect that if those things bother you, then you spending time with a lady you used to date will bother her.

Try to see it from her point of view, and maybe that will help.

writeleft · 01-17-2009, 03:35 PM

I may be out of line, but-

I don't think chevyman ever mentioned "all the exes""calling you all day and nite long".

My understanding is that he is accused of having contact with one ex, everytime he runs out to store. That seems like a rediculous claim by a man-hater (for lack of a better term).

I have followed your posts over the last few months chevyman, and I have posted a few positive replys on your relationship. My perspective certainly never included the image of you running off for quickies with an ex!

Stay true to your heart.