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Old 02-25-2009, 02:23 AM   #1
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I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

I receantly enlisted into the airforce in one of the most saught after fields. I am going into military intelligence that has excellent training and secuity clearances for big bucks down the road. Not to mention a very exciting and challengeing career. However this has been a hard change. It was only 6 months ago that I had my own apartment, deceant job, a ton of friends, and life was pretty good. Then I ended up living with the worst ppl ever, I lost my job, apartment got forclosed, had to deal with all this drama from these crap ppl I lived with. I moved back in with my parents where I am at now and out of the city from all of my friends. The job I was doing before was dead end, and I really did not like it at all. In the all of it this has been a blessing. But the tranistion has been rough. It is like the life I once knew has been completely obliterated. Now I am going to be moveing to a whole new state and possible on the other side of the world. I am actually quite excited about the airforce and the changes that are going to happen. I am going to apply for an officer position after I am in for a yr. But for right now I am haveing a hard time getting along. I am unemployed, living with my parents, no friends around here. I don't leave until may so all I am doing is working out and sitting around on the net, watchin t.v. I go visit friends about once a month in the city, but a lot of times they just screen me now. I don't know if they are mad because I am leaving or maybe the feel like I am a nausence for only comeing in once in a while. It is just hard. Well I suppose the time will pass and I keep trying to find some kind of job until I leave...but it is hard with that short of a window. Anyhow just wondering if others have been through things like this and how you went about it...

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Old 02-26-2009, 02:36 AM   #2
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

I can't speak for the others, but as far I'm concerned, it's ok to post about these issues here. Actually, there is no relationship problem at present in your life, except for those friends of yours, with whom you seem to be losing contact. You always have the option of asking them what is going on, but be prepared for any kind of answer. But this isn't a very serious problem for you now, is it? After you join the Airforce, you may encounter some real difficulties, but don't be afraid, this is very normal.

I also made a major change in my life a year ago and I can't say it is easy. I was not alone like you, I had my family with me. But you are younger than me. If you will look at life as an adventure or as the possibility of, through the very hardships, gaining experience, you will have your own way.

Before you leave, this is an important thing for you to do: clear your clutter. Tidy up your room, throw things away, put things away, give things away. This is a very important step before you embark on a new stage of your life. Clear your clutter and you'll be clearing your mind and feeling "lighter". I can sense some tension about you, but then again this is normal.

Now for it, go to work, and my best wishes to you.

Last edited by pendulum; 02-26-2009 at 02:38 AM.

 
Old 02-26-2009, 02:56 AM   #3
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

You can do it, it is only another 3 months. I agree with Pendulum, spend the time finishing off any unfinished business, sell off your belongings, practise reinventing yourself. I think the most exciting part of a move like this is that you can now be whoever you want to be - you have no one saying "What has come over him?" You can be confident, sociable, forget all your old ways and use bright new strategies to cope with everything. That is good use of your time too - learn about assertiveness, positive thinking, communication skills. Go for it, Sera.

 
Old 02-26-2009, 03:36 PM   #4
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

Yeah I have already started the process of shifting life gears. I sold my car to my dad, gave away a bunch of my other stuff...kept some things of real importance. I don't know what the deal is with my friends, it is not all of them just some whom I was really close with. I am going to visit a girl I dated in college this weekend, looking foward to that. I think the hardest part right now is just haveing no life. I just wake up around noon everyday, exercise a little, watch some t.v., excercise some more..watch more t.v. Don't have anything to look foward to on the weekend. Looking through old pics of my last apartment and friends/parties/events. It just feels wierd and I actually just want to leave now to get the process started. I am trying to get a job for the meantime but it is hard because I can only work for a short period of time and I dont want to lie to the employers about how long I will stay because it could effect my top security clearance with the airforce. I have talked to 5 different places about jobs and they all say they are looking for longer. Sometimes there are those jobs where they just need a temp work for random labor, that is what I am trying to find. Anyhow just bored to tears and stuck in between living in the past and excitment for my future. I know once I get down to texas and through the bootcamp I will start to make new friendships and lead a normal life. I am super excited about the career field. I am going to be a spy. Lots of fun, great career opputunities afterwards. It is just suck a drastic life change. Like before I was kind of the average joe with a big social circle and good social life. Now I am going to be put into position with a lot of responsibility. Big change, but in all honesty I think that it needed to happen

Last edited by Mr.G; 02-26-2009 at 04:08 PM.

 
Old 02-26-2009, 03:49 PM   #5
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

No reason why you can't take up a new hobby until you leave. You can do a lot in three months.
New sports? Charity work? The list could go on.
Or just enjoy your free time because soon enough I'm sure you won't have much time on your hands!

 
Old 02-26-2009, 04:09 PM   #6
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

Yeah Brokenheart you are probably right. Kind of my last 3 months of freedom until I am the goverments property. I have been playing a little hockey. I have been hopeing that I would run into someone I knew from highschool around because I know that some ppl have stayed in this town. I don't know how to contact them though. Well I guess I will just enjoy the time I have and hopefully stumble upon some kind of work.

Last edited by Administrator; 02-26-2009 at 07:03 PM. Reason: Edit off words that are censored

 
Old 02-26-2009, 05:35 PM   #7
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

I understand the feeling you describe. I suspect that in 3 months you'll be wishing you'd relaxed and enjoyed this time more but that's human nature. I'm not one for looking back. Nostalgia is not a comfortable feeling for me.

Are you handy at anything? Could you do some "chores" or jobs around someone's house since it's hard to find an official "job"? I would love to have someone here for a few days to help me move some furniture around and carry some things up and down stairs, maybe do a little painting. So often in life it's a matter of matching up wants and haves. If you could do that sort of thing, maybe your parents could network for you and find out if anyone has things they need done. In a case like this, I'd be thrilled for a helper so they might be too.

Good luck to you in your new career!

 
Old 02-26-2009, 06:22 PM   #8
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

Yeah resolution I have been searching craigs list for jobs like that. The thing about 'sitting' at home is I hate being lazy. But I have hard to getting motivated to do anything besides going to the gym. It will probably come faster than I think. Guess I should just enjoy this time and maybe something will pop up for work.

 
Old 03-01-2009, 10:57 PM   #9
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

Ended up seeing that girl this weekend. It was so fuun. Made me miss her and parts of my old life. WE didnt sleep together which I though was wierd...we just cuddled and made out. Gosh I didnt realize how muched I missed her. It will be nice when I get to my new area and in the swing of things so I can start dateing again.

 
Old 03-02-2009, 11:39 AM   #10
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

Quality time with family/parents. This is a good and in some cases a rare oppertunity. You really don't know when you will see them again after you leave. Take advantage of this free time! Do some volunteer work at the school or community center. If you must work to make a little money, try a temporary employment agency.

 
Old 03-02-2009, 03:54 PM   #11
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Re: I dont know if this is best place to post about dealing with major life changes..

Quote:
Originally Posted by cleansweap View Post
Quality time with family/parents. This is a good and in some cases a rare oppertunity. You really don't know when you will see them again after you leave. Take advantage of this free time! Do some volunteer work at the school or community center. If you must work to make a little money, try a temporary employment agency.
I agree completely! You should really cherish the time you have with your family. Everyone in the military that I know always wishes they had more time with their family. Also, a temp agency is always a good way to go if you need some money. I would also imagine there must be a lot of charity organizations looking for volunteers given the state of the economy.

 
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