partlycloudy

I interned at a state business in college. I was a good employee, my boss liked me, but I felt under unfavorable conditions. It was near graduation time so I was planning on leaving at the end of the month anyway, but ended up quitting a few weeks early. I had been taking birth control pills, and ended them mid-cycle which I didn't know would affect my hormones like it did. One day I felt really bad like I was going to have a nervous breakdown. My boss wasn't there, and I was sitting in for a secretary while she was out of the office for awhile. I remember being really po'ed about doing this becasue she was acting bossy - my boss said not to take orders from anyone but her because the secretaries tend to boss interns around when it's not their place. Regardless, I sat in anyway, and when the secretary came back, I told her that I think I wanted to quit and to just tell my boss that I was leaving. Everything that day was a blur - at the time I didn't feel like I had a grasp on my emotions or actions at all. I felt suicidal on and off for no reason. That afternoon I realized what I'd done and felt really bad about it. I seriously was like, why would I do something like that - I was always very responsible, and this was truly a *** moment both for me and I'm sure it was for my boss. I sent my boss a card that explained inside what had happened. After college graduation, I left town and spent a few years working in a large nearby city.

I've come back to town due to a crime explosion and high cost of living in the city. I've hard a hard time finding work. I work a few hours at a local library and substitute teach. One of the secretaries "Kay" at the business I interned for has a side job at Wal-mart. I run into her there sometimes. I told Kay about what I've been doing, and she mentioned my former boss (I'll call her FB) had been wondering what I was up to lately. The last time I was in Wal-mart, Kay said that FB could really use me in the office since she hadn't had an intern for a long time. I didn't think much of that since I was working more hours at the library at that time. I asked, they don't have interns anymore? She replied that the new administration didn't see a need for them. Politics have shifted things around - all of the main people including HR were replaced when we got a Dem governor. I checked their website, and I don't know any of the new people. Anyway, later I was thinking about what she said and was remembering how much I liked working there. I don't get many hours working at the library and don't expect to get more since they're having cutbacks. Subbing is pretty much a dead end job and stressful. I would really love to at least help out some at my former workplace, though I don't know how to approach this or even if they'd be receptive. I do know of the new HR man - he used to chair the local Democratic Party, and was friends with my grandpa. I'm a registered Dem and worked for the Democratic Party in 06 during the governor/senator election season. I never met this guy though and doubt he'd know who I am through a resume. I'm really not good at asserting myself. I went in Wal-mart last night with the intent of speaking to Kay. I lost my nerve, so I'm glad she wasn't there. I did ask an employee in her dept. when she'd be in, and she said 4:30 today. So, I'm thinking of coming in again, but now I'm thinking maybe it's a bad idea. It's been 7 years since I worked there, and the last impression I left was bad. Would you go for it or not, and how should I go about it if I do? Maybe I should go directly to FB. The good thing about Kay is that she works right next door to FB and she can test the waters with her so if it's an absolute "no," I won't be so embarrassed.