Hello peoples. How's everyone? My son, 16 is temporarily living with my parent, his gparents. He's an amazing respectful helpful kind kid. No interests in alcohol or drugs or smoking, etc. He's very spiritual in fact. There r times however, he does act 16. Tonight he was upset the Suns were losing with the Blazers in the play-offs and uses sarcasm and challenges his gramma in smart alecky ways when he's nervous or upset. That's not allowed. But, pretty normal actually. I respect my parents and so appreciate them allowing tyler to temporarily live with them. I'm his mom and if I know of something inapropriate I feel I have to bring it to his attention. That's how much I love him n care! I sacrifice him not living with me and now being angry at me. But, that's being a parent I believe. My parents deserve respect. They love him so much and do so much for him. Plz respond with any suggestions/ and or advice. I appreciate it. Marla
I really don't think you have a lot to worry about. Most kids are "smart alecks" at one point in their life. As long as your son is on the right path and not getting into bad habits (drugs, alcohol, etc.) he will eventually grow out of the phase.
First of all, you weren't clear as to why your son is angry with you, or why he's at his grandparents. But in my opinion, if he is being disrespectful to his grandparents, whatever the reasons for him being there, arent working. At some point, YOU, HIS MOTHER, need to stand firm, set the limits, boundries, and consequences, and stick to them. Period, end of conversation, no if's, and's, or but's. It's YOUR responsibility to raise YOUR children. If he's being at all disrespectful, it's YOUR responsibility to get that under control.
I think 16 is a really tough age for anyone even when not forced to live with their grandparents. Whatever happened to make you decide that he would be better off with your parents instead of with you is probably bothering him so he is acting out. I think that's really normal.
He is a teenager probably going through puberty. All kids that age think they know it all. Do you remember what it was like to be that age? And now add to the fact that he has to live with his grandparents who most likely can't relate to him and who are so far removed generationaally and you've got the potential for problems.
I think you should be more understanding of how the kid must be feeling. And make yourself available if he wants to talk or has some concerns. He is old enough to where he can understand the situation, so keep him posted on how much longer this living arrangement will continue so he knows it's not a permanent situation.
The more you talk to him and reassure him, the less he will feel like you just gave up on him or didn't want him anymore or whatever. I'm not saying that is the case but he IS a teenager and he most likely has his own feelings about the situation. Make sure you keep his feelings in mind and acknowledge that it's not an ideal situation but that it's temporary and that it's better for reasons "xyz" and tell him what those reasons are. I'm sure he will be fine, you just need to keep the communication going so he feels like his thoughts and concerns are valid, too.