So, currently i'm seeing my ex boyfriend from 5 months ago as we are trying to work things out. We had a pretty messy break up but this past weekend we went on vacation for 4 days together and everything was going pretty good until we decided to go out dancing and get really REALLY wasted. He got a little too drunk, well, REALLY drunk and @ some point he started telling me and crying that we were kidding ourselves and that things would never work out, tears were running down his eyes and he kept telling me that I should leave and go have fun and to just leave him.
he really freaked me out and so I didnt want to leave, we were there together and I didnt want to be left alone, not to mention that I would be worried sick the rest of the night. I started to cry and we got out of the club and we sat outside and he started saying all of these things about the past, he started telling me that he left before because he had found someone that accepted him for who he was and that I never did, but that now I was different, also, he said that he was just pretending and that he was lonely and all this stuff, i just sat there crying.
we got up and we left and went back to our room where I ended up calling my friend (male) who i usually talk to when I'm feeling bad, he asked me who i was talking to and I told him and he got pretty upset and basically he said that anything he said he didnt mean and that he was freaking out because he was so drunk and wanted to be alone and that he always gets really depressed when he's drunk. I ended up crying myself to sleep in his arms while we were both still pretty drunk.
The next morning was pretty weird, he kept saying that he was sorry and that he didnt mean any of it. During lunch he was so quiet and when I asked what was wrong he said that he felt terrible for what happened. I didnt say anything during the rest of the trip because I didnt want to make us both feel bad, but after we got back home I told him how I felt and he said that he is not pretending, that that is stupid, why would he pretend? he could never keep that up, it would be too hard.
he says that he didnt mean anything that he said and he's here because he wants to be here and that he is so sorry and that he is upset that last time around i had made a mess of things and now he was making a mess of things.
I know what I should do.. but it's so hard, and I guess since I still want to be with him I'm just going to have to ignore this and see it as a bump we're gonna have to go through and get past. I dont know if that makes me dumb or just a normal person, I guess everyone has been in this type of situation at some point in there lives.
we basically agreed that if it he got too drunk he would simply tell me he needed to be alone and that he wouldnt push me away and scare me the way he did.
Honestly, I think this could go both ways. Do I think he left you before for another woman? Yes. But the rest of the stuff about feelings....well I dont think that being drunk makes you more honest like many others do. My last boyfriend used to drink alot, and when he got drunk, his feelings were all over the map. One minute he loved me, the next he hated me, then he was crying because he missed his son, then he would threaten me. It was all over the place! I dont drink anymore, and never have been a huge drinker. But for me, I allways felt so in love. Truth be told, once the alcohol wore off, normally the person I spent telling I "loved" all night long, was somebody I wouldn't give a second thought to in any other situation. So did he mean it? maybe, maybe not. Maybe it's worth doing more looking into, or perhaps the two of you just shouldn't be drinking. At any rate, I wish you guys both the best of luck.