I got away
I have told my story here and I got a lot of good advice and followed none of it. And of course, what I was told would happen, happened.
I ended up with a woman who was apparently codependent, bi polar, and several other things that I don't know the names of. As time went by she got worse and worse and I got to my breaking point. I told her the relationship was abusive towards me a few times and got no response. By the end I was walking on eggshells trying to keep her from lashing out at me and failing constantly.
We moved to separate houses a few months ago. At first it was going ok, but slowly she got more and more difficult to deal with. Any female who contacted me was attacked by her and she even ran a few of my friends completely away by her actions. I was accused of cheating on her and many other things. None of which I was doing. Every day it was worse. When we'd IM it would be a two hour solid fight. Mostly me defending myself from something she thought I did but I didn't do.
Finally she kept on pressing me about how I really felt and backed me into a corner. So I came clean and told her it was over and that I had been more afraid of her reactions than in love with her for a very long time.
Since then she has accused me of terrible things that I have not done. She has threatened to sick the police and federal government on me. She has embarrassed me on my social networking sites by making rude and threatening comments. She even had her sister message me and make threats over things I have no part in. I knew it would be bad when I broke up with her. That's why I avoided it for so long. I was just trying to keep things calm and peaceful, but the fights would not stop.
So if anyone was wondering how this saga ended. That's it. As for me, I am getting on with my life and have even found a new woman that is not going to be the trouble that this last one was. First of all, she isn't married and doesn't have a boyfriend. She owns her own house and has a good paying job. She's smart, has 3 degrees and is very fit physically. We have agreed to keep it "friends with benefits" for now. That way there is no pressure on us and instead we can get to know each other and see what feelings develop. The benefits part means I don't have to worry about needing sex and not getting it. She is older than me so she's mature. The only drawbacks I have found is that she has an 8 year old son from a previous marriage and lives 45 miles from me. We're not getting the kid involved in any way for the foreseeable future so he won't be affected if things don't work out between us.
I guess sometimes you have to take that chance it works out. Other times it doesn't and you try again.