What in the world should I do? - Relationship Health Message Board

Lector · 12-20-2002, 11:23 AM

Ok heres the deal...
3 weeks ago I met this guy, we talk online all the time (he lives almost an 1hr and 40mins from me so the phone is out of question) we email, and set times to meet each other at the local college where we attend. Last night he took me to his house, to meet his friends and such. Well while at his house we started to make out, it got a little heavy like kissing, feeling under the clothes... everything. Nothing sexual happend; Now here is the problem, while all this was going on he got on top of me and said "you are so beautiful to me" this sent a shock through me becuase no has ever said that to me. But I dont feel the same about him... in a relationship you have to be both physcally and emotionally attracted to the other person. I dont find him attractive to me at all, but the things he says to me and the way he touches me just turns me on. He is the nicest person i've ever met in my life! And I dont know how to break it off seeing as though he is so attracted to me. Also the distance thing is a big issue.

what in the name of gods green earth should I do?

MonsterBiceps · 12-20-2002, 12:50 PM

I'm not real sure what you should tell him. I guess you should not tell him you don't want to see him anymore because you don't find him attractive. After all, you did make out with him so its a little late now. So that means you will have to come up with some nice little lie that doesn't leave him with a horrible self image.

OOOh, tell him you are a man stuck in a womans body and you want to have a sex change. That should scare him away.

ravekane · 12-20-2002, 02:08 PM

Hi,

I think that you should tell him that you started to date someone else, that always works for me.

Don't say your not attracted to him, just let things cool down a while then tell him that you're w/ someoen else.

Mabye your feelings will grow for him, if he's nice and talks to you good. I mean love grows, and once you see that person you might just think he's attrative the more you get to know him. Good luck.

charby15 · 12-20-2002, 02:26 PM

Your best bet is to keep it civil and just tell him the distance isn't working. that you want to find someone closer but you would love to stay friends and keep talkin online. You did say he was a great guy, you just not attarcted to him. So why not stay friends.

*SoccerMom* · 12-20-2002, 07:09 PM

Lector~
I can remember having those "WHAT WAS I THINKING!?!?" moments, but this seems a little different. It seems that you had emailed him and had some sort of dating experience since you said he was the nicest guy you know....did you not find him at all attractive before this happened?
It seems that besides appearances, you really liked this guy. He said some things that really made you feel good. From experience, I can tell you that your first impressions don't always mean anything. I know that when I first met my hubby, I never thought he was my type. We ended up friends and, one night, he kissed me.....FIREWORKS! Funny thing is that even all these years later, he is still the hottest man in the world to me and I am never not turned on by the slightest touch, kiss or look. I don't even "see" any other men because no one can hold a candle to what I have with my hubby. I wouldn't be too quick to toss it away...give it some time!