when........??? - Relationship Health Message Board

rock'n'roll · 12-29-2002, 11:48 AM

i'm going to try to keep this as short as possible. my girlfriend and i have been dating for a little less than a year, we are completly in love with eachother, and we've often talked about wanting to get married someday. in two years she will be going away to a dance school in New York, right now we live on the West Coast of Canada, i have no doubts that things will change within two years, so my question is would it be ok if i proposed to her before she went away? how long should i wait before i do?? how will i know when it is the right time? thank you for taking the time to read this.

Griffy · 12-29-2002, 12:04 PM

I'll need to know how old the two of you are so I can give advice....(?)

rock'n'roll · 12-29-2002, 12:36 PM

we're both 18, but despite the fact we are young we are very serious about eachother. i really need advice, and please don't tell me we're too young to be thinking about this.

Samisunrider · 12-29-2002, 12:40 PM

Ok, im not going to say your too young but im going to say hold off the proposal for a while. See it as something your looking forward to for when she returns. Im only 20 and have been in a relationship just over a year and things seem perfect, i know exactly what your talking about but everyone keeps saying the same thing: People change so dont base everything on this relatiohship. I dont take those comments negatively, im confident of my relationship but at the same time i consider myself realistic and although i would LOVE to propose at such an age personally we aren't ready, and i would say the same about you guys.

[This message has been edited by Samisunrider (edited 12-29-2002).]

manderee · 12-29-2002, 03:01 PM

Hi Rock, You both may well be in love, but wanting to get married just because she is leaving is not a good thing to do. People do change and you can't stop that, but if you are truly in love, time or distance can not change that and both of you will want the same thing when she gets back. Marriage is not a fix-it when you want someone to stay around, it will only cause much more problems if one or both of you decide you don't want to be together anymore. Divorce is not a pretty thing, trust me. Enjoy your time together and see where this relationship takes you, only time will tell.
Take Care and God Bless

Mandee