Ladies, opinions please? - Relationship Health Message Board

nick3454 · 06-21-2003, 08:29 AM

I'm a 20 yr old virgin, and my reason is that i don't see sex as just something casual but more like something that is shared between 2 ppl that have a mutual understanding with each other. As hard as it is to avoid sometimes, i'm waiting for that special someone.

so how do u feel about ppl who think like this? How would u feel if we were in a relationship that was getting more intimate and reached to the point of sex, and i stopped and said as much as i want to i can't because i'm saving myself? would u be offended?

let me know what u all think

DanaJ · 06-21-2003, 08:59 AM

I'd be surprised, but it would be generally a good feeling. To me, that shows an incredible amount of self control, and I have much admiration adn respect for people who are in the minority.
I hope you find someone who shares your views

911_mom · 06-21-2003, 08:59 AM

If we were in a relationship and I truly loved you, I would respect your wishes and wait.
If I were you, don't wait until the last minute, right in the heat of the moment, before telling someone how you feel about it. Tell them after the first couple dates. That way, if a girl feels that she can't wait for you then she can move on and not waste your time!

Creeping Crud · 06-21-2003, 09:44 AM

Hey Nick,

I agree with 911_mom.. It's better to get your views out in the open early on rather than risk offending someone in the heat of the moment or getting dumped because your views don't mesh with your significant other's..

Unfortunately, if you wait until the heat of the moment to divulge that little tidbit of information, you are going to end up offending a woman (and possibly end up ruining your relationship with her).. Nobody takes sexual rejection well and in today's society, it's a little hard to believe that there are still some people out there who are saving themselves for marriage..

Don't get me wrong, it's very admirable.. I just think that if you're going to be involved in a long term relationship with someone, you should be honest with them from the beginning.. You can't ever hope to have a mutual understanding with someone if you can't be honest enough with them to reach an understanding..

Take Care,
Melanie

nick3454 · 06-21-2003, 10:04 AM

thanks for the responses, i would tell the person before the relationship gets serious. But sometimes I feel like the lone virgin in the world, if u know what i mean. i don't know if my views will change as i get older. But i think that if a woman understands my view and is willing to wait she would be a very special person, even if she wasn't a virgin, she was still willing to wait.

what about ladies who r virgins, what's ur opinion about ur virginity?