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Old 12-31-2010, 02:45 PM   #1
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no gift for christmas this year either?

I work as a housekeeper for this lady for 9 years now, she gave me a christmas gift every year but for last year and this year, I don't know what is the problem if I did something wrong or what, I don't understand the change of heart, other than that, she is very nice with me and all but this really is a bummer for me. I don't care about the gift per se, although her gift is very generous and she has such good taste, but the action, the fact that I feel ignored and of no value. She just got married last month and invited us, me and hubby, and even bought me a dress and shoes! but the fact that this is the second year that she's packing gifts for everybody in front of me and gave me nothing is really really hurting! What are your thoughts? am I being too sensitive or foolish? I work for her brother too and he never gave me anything but for a couple of years when she gave me too, these past 2 years he didn't give me anything because she didn't either.

 
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Old 12-31-2010, 02:54 PM   #2
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

I can sympathize with you. I work as a gardener. The same thing has happened to me. I say don't worry about it. Be glad that you have steady work and get paid in full on time. That's a blessing these days. A gift is something extra. If you're not expecting it and not counting on it then you can't feel hurt.

 
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Old 12-31-2010, 02:54 PM   #3
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

sorry to say but you are bothered you did not get a gift this year. i understand why you feel that way i think i would aswell. please re-read your thread and if it was someone else who wrote it would you think they was upset about a gift not been given. its ok to feel upset about it you must feel like she doesnt like you anymore. can you talk to her?

 
Old 12-31-2010, 03:02 PM   #4
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

This is a terrible and awkward situation. I feel for you, I can feel the pain in your words...very hurtful and confusing. We are here to support you.

 
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Old 12-31-2010, 03:45 PM   #5
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

[QUOTE=please re-read your thread and if it was someone else who wrote it would you think they was upset about a gift not been given.
I didn't mean it that way, I totally don't care for the material part of the deal, I just felt left out and hurt, I even cried on my way home and I don't know why is affecting me so much!

 
Old 12-31-2010, 03:47 PM   #6
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

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I can sympathize with you. I work as a gardener. The same thing has happened to me. I say don't worry about it. Be glad that you have steady work and get paid in full on time. That's a blessing these days. A gift is something extra. If you're not expecting it and not counting on it then you can't feel hurt.
Esker, you are right, in these economy I am very grateful I even have a job!

 
Old 12-31-2010, 03:57 PM   #7
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

sounds like you have been close to this woman for 9 years and thats a long time and for her to not get you one and everybody else one after all the hard work you do for her i can understand you feeling upset. i take it you got her a gift aswell ? have you had any argument/tension in the past 2 year ? try not to let it bother you too much you still have your husband and/or kids i can't remember if you mentioned kids or not lol. whats your husband say about it?

 
Old 12-31-2010, 03:58 PM   #8
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

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sorry to say but you are bothered you did not get a gift this year. i understand why you feel that way i think i would aswell. please re-read your thread and if it was someone else who wrote it would you think they was upset about a gift not been given. its ok to feel upset about it you must feel like she doesnt like you anymore. can you talk to her?
Oh I'm sorry it looks that I care for the gift not been given, i don't care for that at all, is the thought, the action and feeling left out and ignored, that's all, I even cried on my way back home and honestly I don't know why this is affecting me so much!! I don't think she dislikes me at all, she's very nice with me and even invited me to her wedding so I'm not going to approach her about it, it'll feel awkward.

 
Old 12-31-2010, 04:05 PM   #9
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

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sounds like you have been close to this woman for 9 years and thats a long time and for her to not get you one and everybody else one after all the hard work you do for her i can understand you feeling upset. i take it you got her a gift aswell ? have you had any argument/tension in the past 2 year ? try not to let it bother you too much you still have your husband and/or kids i can't remember if you mentioned kids or not lol. whats your husband say about it?
She's pregnant due next month and I gave her a nice gift for the baby which she thanked me profusely, and every time I go back home to visit the family I always bring gifts to my clients. We didn't have any problems whatsoever never, we have a good relationship and talk a lot when time permits due to her busy schedule so I'm puzzled and hurt. My husband keeps telling that is time for me for a change, do something else so I don't get too attached to people, and no, we don't have kids, we have each other and god bless a great marriage so i got a lot to be thankful for.

 
Old 12-31-2010, 04:25 PM   #10
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

i think your husband may well be right. glad you have a fab husband . that was very sweet giving a baby gift, its mean that she didnt give you a christmas gift as your not only a worker for her your a close friend.

 
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Old 01-02-2011, 04:56 PM   #11
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

What stood out for me was that she bought you shoes and a dress for her wedding. Maybe that was an early Christmas gift? She didn't have to do that either.
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Old 01-02-2011, 05:01 PM   #12
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

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What stood out for me was that she bought you shoes and a dress for her wedding. Maybe that was an early Christmas gift? She didn't have to do that either.
good point, wedding outfits are not cheap either usually.

 
Old 01-03-2011, 09:27 AM   #13
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

If you get attached to people easily, it will probably happen in any job, so switching careers won't necessarily get rid of that aspect of your personality.

Maybe in the last 2 years she started budgeting for christmas and had to cut you out (not saying this in a mean way), so she tries to make up for it in other ways (like getting you the dress and shoes not during xmas time). My guess is its a simple reason you haven't even thought of that has nothing to do with you.

And since she bought you the dress/shoes, it doesn't sound like you are doing anything wrong.

Even though you have known her for a long time, I'm sure there is a part of her life (finances, relationship with her spouse) that she keeps apart from you and the reason probably lies somewhere in there.

 
Old 01-03-2011, 01:47 PM   #14
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

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Originally Posted by Belly Kelly View Post
What stood out for me was that she bought you shoes and a dress for her wedding. Maybe that was an early Christmas gift? She didn't have to do that either.
You're right, she didn't have to but let me clarify that she did clothed a lot of friends, not just me, anyway I'm probably giving it too much thought!

 
Old 01-03-2011, 01:56 PM   #15
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Re: no gift for christmas this year either?

christmas has passed, me thinks you should let it go. much worser things in life to stress about not that any of us need it lol. just forget about it as much as you can and think happy new year thoughts. she sounds like a nice woman like you she probably didnt mean anything by it. you get respect from her so thats a really good thing to cherish.

 
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