Re: always moanaing and bitter
You are the ONLY one who can take control of your life. I understand from other posts that you have serious issues with your mother and gran. Okay, so distance yourself from them before you end up just like them. Go out and make some friends - you should never, ever rely on just one person to make you happy. Remember this: "I alone and responsible for my happiness."
You can either take charge of your life, decide who you want to be and work to achieve it, or you can drag yourself down, blame others for the "bad" things that happen to you, and fall into depression and become just like those you blame.
If it's really bad or seems insurmountable, then you should seek counseling. I don't know where you live but there often are free counseling services that you can take advantage of if you can't afford it or don't have health insurance for it. There is nothing to be embarrassed about in seeking out counseling - it's really no different than talking to a friend or a bartender or something similar. It's an impartial person who can listen to you and help you figure out without having a stake in the matter.
It is guaranteed that you will lose your bf if you continue to moan and groan and act bitter. Sure, a man may stay with you physically, but he will seek out people to be around who are more upbeat and not bitter, and you may even drag him down with you.
Just continue to tell yourself that YOU are responsible for your happiness. Go out, join a gym or start walking or running, find ways to meet people. The 'Net has lots of listings of meet-ups where you can find people with similar interests. Make an effort to start saying only nice things. Keep your mouth shut if you feel that you are about to say something bitter or to complain. Pay attention to what you say for a whole month. Keep a journal and hide it from your gran and mother. Tell yourself to ignore their "bad" behavior and remind yourself constantly of the person you really want to be. It takes 21 days to form a habit, so you need to continue to work at it. If you do it faithfully you will become the person you really want to be.