Well, this is my first really positive post on here, and I haven't made a new thread in forever! I posted last year all the time about my boyfriend that said things all the time to hurt my feelings without knowing it, I was worried because he had a girl friend that he seemed to still have feelings for, etc. Well we broke up many months ago and since then I had another boyfriend with whom I had no jealousy or obsessive thoughts whatsoever for some reason, but we broke up because he lied a lot about stupid stuff and would say things like "a bunch of really hot girls have 'offered' to have sex with me recently, but I have said no because I just want to be with you." Needless to say, I broke that off and for a couple months now I have actually really enjoyed being single!!! I like not having to answer to anybody and to just do what I want and hang out with my friends. I used to hole up with some guy and when we broke up, I had no one to hang out with cause I'd ditched all my friends while we were together. I so don't want to be like that anymore. I do get lonely sometimes and think it'd be nice to have a guy over here to cuddle or watch a movie with, but I'm not looking for anybody or keeping anybody on the backburner like I usually do.
I feel like now it's going to be hard to get back into a relationship because I would have trust issues and I just don't want the burden of having to deal with feelings of jealousy and always wondering what someone is up to, dealing with heartbreak and abandonment, etc. Has anyone else that used to have bad relationships gotten used to being single, started to enjoy it and then gone to the other extreme, avoiding relationships at all costs? I think it'll be great for me to be single for a year or so, but eventually I'll get in another relationship and really don't want to go back to being like how I was. Anyone relate?
Also, now I keep noticing stuff that didn't used to bother me but now irks me to no end. I have a guy "friend" that I hung out with all the time and I would consider one of my best friends, but he admitted that he wanted more. Since I finally became assertive and said it wasn't going to happen, I have noticed that he has changed. He even talks differently, doesn't want to hang out as much, and his real personality has come out more - he talks about wanting to f%#^ girls rather than "make love" like he used to say, and he's just a different person. He was apparently just acting all nice to me because he wanted more. That's happened a lot, and I feel like guys just act like they're your friend to try to get into your parents or be your boyfriend, then lose interest in being your friend when they find out you don't want them that way. This really bothers me and just makes me not want to associate with any of them!
hi dig, good to see you back!
i can totally relate to your first post.....after numerous unhealthy relationships, i stayed single for approx 3 years and I loved it. i was at the point where i contempleted being single forever and the thought of it didn't bother me. i ended up getting into a relationship and it's been about a year and 1/2 and there are many times i wish i was still single, and if this relationship doesn't work out, it's not the end of the world.....
enjoy your time to yourself!