Hi there I am going out with a women that I found out she had bipolar. She gets her moods somedays. Everything is fine now and 3-10 minutes later lookout. I always keep us busy and always doing something. We get home and it's like trouble starts like fights over little things. Do people with this disorder get like this. If so what do I do in a situation like this. Could someone please help me out here. Thanks...
I dont think there is anything you can do other then get out of the way. No amount of support on your end is going to make a difference. She has to do that for herself. You just set yourself up for a long, drawn out, emotionaly unhealthy relationship. If I were you, I would get out of it.
That doesn't sound much like bipolar, more like a personality disorder.
Either way though, if you're not too entrenched in the relationship I'd get out, fast. There is nothing you can do. All the love or tricks or patience or understanding in the world won't help and you're just in for a world of hurt.
Yes she does take medication for this problem. I thank you all for your help there. Like today she was not happy at all that I was goping out just to do my thing. She had work of her own to do. She always wants to be close all the time. She says you never want to saty home anymore. Like I use a laptop as you see here I'm at a libruary right now thats just my time away from home. What is wrong with that. I think she should be liuck I don't cheat or go to bars drinking away.
Please let me know how you all feel aboutt his thanks. Limeridge
You can't change her, and whatever you do when your in this situation will most likely be the wrong thing in her eyes. Either that or she'll find something else to have a go about. This will be your life, a roller coaster of ups and downs.
The only thing you can do is decide if you want to put up with this, or walk away.
Hi there yes I know she does not want to leave me because I do think of her and help her out. She really has no one else that would put up with her which I know. I will have a long talk with her and see what happens..
Hi there yes I know she does not want to leave me because I do think of her and help her out. She really has no one else that would put up with her which I know. I will have a long talk with her and see what happens..
You are dating someone not with mood swings or what you see as mere mood swings, your dating someone who has a mental disorder. With a person who is bipolar all you can do is simply not take any negative attitude to heart. Just understand that once that phase is gone she will feel guilty (in the guilt) stage for what she has said, this will cause her to feel anxious and emotional. If you accept her the way she is without complicating her complicated brain and emotions, you would be less stressed out. So your problem is not her disorder, your problem is your coping skills. With that being said, I would check out a guide on how to date a bipolar person, different tips can help -you- cope with dating a person with this disorder, enhance your relationship and reduce stress. Keep in mind she did not choose to have this disorder.
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Thank you very much for your reply there. Yes I understand what you mean.
We have ahad a long talk lastnight about it and she now understands how I feel and I understand what she is really going threw. I'll just have to take each day by day and understand her more. Thansk everyone
i have bipolar. it has been bad in the past. alot of people say leave a bipolar person as if no one with bipolar is worthy of a relationship and thats wrong. it can be managed with the right medication. mine is been managed and i am doing incredibly well and your girlfriend may need to change medication or a higher dose if they are not keeping her calm. it is hard work to be with a bipolar person, but its also hard work having the problem too. she is suffering also and alot of behaviour isnt real. bipolar people tend to do things or say things that they dont mean and dont mean any real hurt or harm. some bipolar episodes can be uncontrollable if not on the right medication. sometimes ya just have to go through a few before getting the one that suits you. well her.
Yes I understand you there, she does get very angry at times just like that. I could say the wrong thing like joke aroiund she will come right at me as if she wants to fight me. She has hit me many times. The good thing for her is I'm a men that won't hit any woman. There are times I have said to her that I'm kind of finished with you forever. She is in a spot now where she has nowhere to go. Her parents won't take her back. So it's here or the streets. I try to help her all the times threw thick or thin here. I'm jusat glad you people have helped me out by telling me what and how they get with this illness. Thanks again. limeridge
hmmmm makes me wonder if there could be something else other than bipolar. unless she has it severe. but the violence is not acceptable. she needs to goto anger management or get on a better medication. suggest that to her. because i know you are there for her now but unless she changes and gets more stable she will wear you down and one day you will leave her because you will have had enough. dont be with her out of pity or because shes got no where else to go. you need your own happiness.
Yes thank you no like the past few days I have done my own things. She has not liked it at all but I have still been there for her. She has said the last few days you always want to be on your own. Well I would have to say we both have are own lifes to. Like you both need free time and time for yourself. She is a type that wants to be together all the time. Now she does things like volunteers for a retirement home and helps out once a week. Thats fine wioth her but when I do things like that and are gone all day she does not like it. It's like well what is she doing all day by herself. I'm a type that can always find things to do. I'm never bored. I volunteer visit people always doing something.
Yes I can't work because i have epilepsy which is undercontrol.
Thansk for your respond
Limeridge
She is in a spot now where she has nowhere to go. Her parents won't take her back. So it's here or the streets. I try to help her all the times threw thick or thin here.
it took me a while to learn this, but when someones family doesn't want to help them, there is usually a good reason why. They know them better than you do....they know nothing will change, while you still have hope because it's a new relationship for you. Another thing that took me a while to learn.....when I'm in a relationship with someone and I feel sorry for them, or I need to rescue them somehow, that is not a healthy relationship, and it never will be.
Hi there Rose thanks for your reply. Yes I understand what you mean there.
She has her moods so fast. I talked to her today and she switched so fast. She always has things to say to put me down. I thank you so much for your help and making me feel better.
you don't deserve her wrath or to be put down by her.
I was married to a bi-polar man for 10 years.......he was unmedicated and in denial. If someone is on medication there is 1/2 a chance......if not, there is no chance
Hi there rose yes I understand you there I talked to her lastnight and yes her husband over 10 years ago they both had that. I did not know that at all. She just said I get it ever now and then you have to accept me how I am I accet you. Like I have epilepsy and memory problems. I enjoy my life with a problem or not one. Life is to short. Sometimes a talk can make things go better. She is a type that likes to settle things and always be talking in stead of arrguing.
Her parents told me to about her and how she gets, they are happy I take her how she is. It's just am I doing the right thing for myself thats all.
Thanks again Rose.
I used to date a girl that was bipolar and clinically depressed. It was rough. One minute everything was perfect and the next minute she was completely different. She had meds to help her, but it didn't seem like enough. The relationship didn't work out as I just couldn't handle it anymore.
i have bipolar. it has been bad in the past. alot of people say leave a bipolar person as if no one with bipolar is worthy of a relationship and thats wrong. it can be managed with the right medication. mine is been managed and i am doing incredibly well and your girlfriend may need to change medication or a higher dose if they are not keeping her calm. it is hard work to be with a bipolar person, but its also hard work having the problem too. she is suffering also and alot of behaviour isnt real. bipolar people tend to do things or say things that they dont mean and dont mean any real hurt or harm. some bipolar episodes can be uncontrollable if not on the right medication. sometimes ya just have to go through a few before getting the one that suits you. well her.
Yes I nkow what you mean there. Thanks, yes she does just lose it just like that sometimes. I could say the wrong thing and watch out. I'm a person that likes to joke around and laugh and just have fun with life. Her on the other hand a little different. I could be laughing about this and that and her nothing funny about it at all. I have been a person that likes to be on the go and be busy with my life. I do have epilepsy and does not get in my way by means. She always says I understand your problem but you don't understand mine. Which is not true. I have read on the net about it and just seen what she has gone threw. I go on the Family & Friends of the Mentally Ill board and ask questions about it. I thank you people for helping me out here.
