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Old 03-27-2011, 08:57 AM   #1
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How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

I am in a relationship with a wonderfully sweet man who wears an upper denture. From the first time we french-kissed I could tell he had them. He has not told me and it doesn't bother me in any way. However, I can feel he holds back sometimes when we kiss and it's probably because of it. I want to tell him that I know and that it doesn't make any difference whatsoever to me.

I just don't know how if and how to approach the subject with him. We are very close now and also were 40 years ago when we were young. I think he feels a bit embarrassed by it and I DO NOT want to hurt his sense of confidence.
Any suggestions? Thanks.

 
Old 03-27-2011, 09:38 AM   #2
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Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

Quote:
Originally Posted by portable View Post
I am in a relationship with a wonderfully sweet man who wears an upper denture. From the first time we french-kissed I could tell he had them. He has not told me and it doesn't bother me in any way. However, I can feel he holds back sometimes when we kiss and it's probably because of it. I want to tell him that I know and that it doesn't make any difference whatsoever to me.

I just don't know how if and how to approach the subject with him. We are very close now and also were 40 years ago when we were young. I think he feels a bit embarrassed by it and I DO NOT want to hurt his sense of confidence.
Any suggestions? Thanks.
Is it possible that he may need a better or new denture to make it more stable? Since I don't know this person so I am making this guess. My father-in-law had loose upper denture and a lady friend of his (a dentist) made a new upper denture for him and it is much better. However I have no clues about kissing with denture.

You can mention this issue to him from the point of his dental health or chewing food. You don't have to talk about kissing to embarrass him.


Hope this helps,
Nina

Last edited by ninamarc; 03-27-2011 at 09:53 AM.

 
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Old 03-27-2011, 10:14 AM   #3
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Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

Just bring it up. I'd probably do it in a joking or lighthearted manner, but that's just how I am. However you do it, he'll probably be relieved to get it out in the open. No one likes hiding a flaw, or pretending it's not there. Part of being in a relationship is accepting your mate for who they are, and it'll only make the relationship stronger to show him that it's no big deal.

 
Old 03-27-2011, 10:36 AM   #4
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Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

I can see how you would want to word this carefully, as not to embarrass him, but once you do get the subject broached, I am sure both of you will be relieved.

Of course there is nothing wrong with wearing dentures, many of us will be wearing them ourselves before the end. I would not let it go too long, so if he does have any protection up, he can get rid of that concern as soon as possible.

Without knowing either of you, I cannot think of the exact words to use, but I am sure you have some that would work fine. Since you are obviously aware of the possible embarrassment he might feel, I am sure you will be sensitive and understanding to his feelings.

You could mention how you like how clean and nice his breath is, how you love kissing him, and how much you love his smile, to start the conversation off (if those are all true)...When you put a bit of positive focus on his teeth, he will likely reply with a comment about how it is all due to his dentures, and you can respond...wonderful!

It is so nice to get passed any issues of self confidence which need not be in your relationship as soon as possible, so you can move beyond the superficial and on to the real stuff.

Please let us know how this turns out, I am quite interested to find out how you open the conversation and his response. Best wishes to both of you...

Janet

 
Old 03-27-2011, 11:01 AM   #5
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Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

How long have you been dating?

I wouldn't say anything out of the blue. I would wait for him to bring it up. I think there will come the day when he will do it or he won't be able to hide it any more. Then you will smile.

You don't need to tell him you know and that it doesn't make any difference to you. Just keep kissing him and accepting his kisses. That is the best way for him to know that he is being accepted, for he may think that through your words you are just trying to sound pleasant.

If he asks you about it, then you can tell him your honest opinion, but only in that stance.

 
Old 03-27-2011, 11:24 AM   #6
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Smile Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

[QUOTE=pendulum;4716643]How long have you been dating

We've been dating almost 10 months. It's our 2nd time around as we were a couple as teenagers... We were apart 39 years and he is definitely conscious of his looks since we're now middle-aged and in love again.

This has been on my mind for a while and something I'm afraid to address though. Your advice has helped. Thanks.

 
Old 03-27-2011, 11:26 AM   #7
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Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

Thank you! This is what my gut tells me to do ---- nothing at all and just keep loving him, his smile and his kisses.

 
Old 03-27-2011, 11:29 AM   #8
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Re: How do I tell my boyfriend I know he wears upper denture?

If that is what your gut is telling you, then go with that. My response becomes moot, but that is Ok! Enjoy your time with this man, he sounds wonderful! Hats off to pendulum, for nailing this one on the head.

Janet

 
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