Hello,
I will appreciate your perspective because I am afraid I am biased and I would not' want to be unfair to my husband.
So two years ago I discovered he had a sex-sms relation with a girl before and after our marriage, he promised to stop -although I did catch him contacting her again, he said he was just curious. Again, in theory he stopped.
Then, he started going to swim at lunchtime with a girl from his work. I saw some texting on his phone and I told him I was not comfortable with that. So in theory it stopped.
Now, he asked another girl from his work to teach him squash but he told me it was just a onetime thing, because he and his male friend wanted to play. Though I discovered they actually have settle a schedule to go and when I asked him what happened he said his male friend was not interested at all. And his sex drive is very high which is not common in him.
I have asked him to make plans for us (because it is always me organizing things) and do sport, but he never does, except if is another girl telling him.
So, I think he is not happy or completely happy with me, but he does not have the guts to tell me or he is maybe waiting for me to take the first step. I am exaggerating or looking at things the wrong way?
Thanks!
I think you have a valid reason why your concerned about him and these girls. I would be concerned too. So he has no interest in making plans with you , but makes plans with girls? hes also been lying to you aswell. Maybe tell him you want to go to squash with him see what he says. Think you need to have a calm talk with him tell him your not happy with the situation and that you need some reassurance that nothing is going on and that you need to make plans together and go out and have fun and ask how hes feeling and if hes happy too. See what his reaction to that is. If nothing changes i would consider maybe leaving. I do think though he is acting suspicious about the girls. The sex sms is the thing that i think he is a cheater. Just my thoughts. Texting another woman sexual texts is practically cheating and usually them sort of texts lead to meet ups.
I think whatever be the case, you should directly speak with your husband as far as any issue is concerned. Because he being your husband there should be nothing that should be hidden from either of you. So be precise and discreet and speak out. I am sure you would feel better.
Do talk to him and tell him how his actions make you feel. Its interesting to note that most if not all of his relationships appear to be with women. Either he can't relate to other men, or he's looking for something on the side. I will tel you, that behavior will not stop despite what you do about it. If a guy is going to do that, there's no rehabilitation.
