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Old 10-01-2012, 10:36 AM   #16
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

You're completely focusing on the wrong issue.

I've been trying to explain to you that your problem is not your feelings for your boyfriend. That's all you keep talking about but that is not the issue at all. The major issue here that needs to be handled is your OCD. The fact that you keep obsessing about and crying about and allowing these thoughts to consume your entire being is the problem. The sooner you get the OCD under control the sooner you'll stop worrying about your feelings for your boyfriend.

Start doing something about it by researching about OCD and how it affects relationships because it's such a common problem that there are tons of websites out there with info. Start reading self help books about how to overcome OCD and use the methods that they talk about to stop focusing on these thoughts. I'm telling you that is what you need to do if you want this to get better. Stop asking why you're falling out of love with your bf and start working on how to stop the OCD instead.

 
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Old 10-01-2012, 10:41 AM   #17
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

So I'm not falling out of love with him it's the thoughts that I keep obsessing about which in turn is making me feel like I am? I don't want to wind up breaking up with him ans regretting it. I feel like I can't even remember how I felt with him prior to this. And that everything is becoming a memory. I have serious issues.

 
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Old 04-23-2013, 07:02 AM   #18
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

I can see this post is rather old but I am feeling like I am going through exactly how you are now with my boyfriend of 8 and a half months!! how did yours turn out now 6 months on?

Jasmine xx

 
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Old 04-23-2013, 07:15 AM   #19
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

Hey! It actually has not happened since then, it has started to maybe once but I told myself to xa down, quit thinking irrationally , and just be happy. I have not felt that way since and we are happier as ever. We will be together 4 years in may! I did go through a few days of depression because to be honest, in the beginning of our relationship, a couple years ago I made 2 mistakes. I did not have sex with anyone, but I still beat myself up about it, sometimes I wonder if that's half the reason I was feeling all those weird feelings to begin with. But regardless, picture yourself with someone else. Can you see it? Can you see him with someone else and feel happy? Or it not bother you? Maybe you two spend too much time together. My boyfriend and I have been together almost everyday for 4 years straight, which I know sounds really unhealthy and has caused us to argue in the past. Is it a possibility that y'all have only been dating 8 months and you really are losing interest but you're too 'attached' to let go? Ask yourself these things , look forward to hearing back from you. HUGS

 
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Old 04-23-2013, 09:52 AM   #20
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

Thank you for replying! so how did you get back to being happy? No the thought of him with someone else brings me to tears and causes my anxiety to get worse! and I dont want anyone else or see myself with somebody else and loving them? and no I'm not loosing interest as i WANT to be with him and for things go back to how they were more than anything!! I have to say you saying that I might be loosing intrest made my anxiety get worse! I admit we see each other roughly about 4 times a week though but like you im scared to be away from him as I am scared that I wont miss him I already have OCD and im a big over thinker hense my feelinsg seemed to of changed over night even though I am in a perfect relationship with the boy of my dreams. I am very happy that you and your boyfriend are back on track and congrats about the 4 years in may!! xx

 
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Old 04-23-2013, 10:00 AM   #21
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

Don't let what I said give you more anxiety! I'm the same way, if someone says something to me about this subject of losing interest, I freak out too. If you're like me, and you still want the relationship, want to be with him, then you must remind yourself of why you fell in love with him in the first place. What I did, was eben though I couldn't Ignore how weird I felt towards him, I still tried to act how I usually did with him when I was feeling like myself. And eve tuslly those feelings slowly disappeared. You have to remind yourself of the good times with each other as well. I have OCD as well, which is part of the feelings. Your OCD is leading to compulsive thoughts and I have been there before. Tell yourself those thoughts aren't true. Be yourself, it took a month for me when I posted this for them to go away, but doing what I said really helped! And I'm sorry if I made you upset :/

 
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Old 03-08-2014, 05:15 AM   #22
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

Hey Ashlee095 I am going through the samething as u were along time ago. I have always had anxiety about losing my Boyfriend of alil little more than 3 1/2 years. I've done so much research that it makes me feel like I never loved my bf... it hurts bc when I feel those feelings I start to cry badly... I keep testing my feelings for him too.. we went through alot last year due to the environment we lived in. His mom does drugs and is a severe alcoholic along with mentally abusing me and my baby.. I feei regret saying alot of things last year I know that its bc of the environment. But now we don't live there anymore. He lives with his sister and I live with my mother.I wanna forget all the bad things that has happened in that house... it's so hard..
This is my second time going through this with him but the first time I was able to break free but now I feel like I really don't love him but I cry my eyes out when I feel like he'll be with someone else or never see me anymore along with not being able to hold or kiss him again. I still love his smile his blue eyes he has dealt with so much stress bc of me I wanna to think the way I use to and feel the way I did before. II've been stressing out about this for 4 months but I feel like my anxiety is gone along with how I use to feel... please give me advise I wanna save my relationship! !!

 
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Old 03-12-2014, 05:23 PM   #23
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Re: my 3 and a half year relationship is slipping away :(

You are not alone ! I have been with my husband 6 yrs married for almost 3 yrs and i thought he was just the most amazing man he was m souk mate that i thought i woukd never find ! But then i found some messages to amd from him and an ex gorlfriend from another state when i asked him about them of course he said she was just a friend and he wqnted nothing to do with her ! Then shortly before our wedding i saw on his marriage license that he had been married twidpce before not just once then i found out also he has another son that he still has not told me about ! And it gets bette ! After he said he wanted nothing to do wirh his little friend. Found even more messages and some way out of context to be just a friend he even asked for her to send nife pictures of her great body when she is suntanning ! Hice huh how the heck am. Suppose to feel and again hr turns everything on me ! And the messages he says were just a joke well i am not laughing ! I just dont feel the same i really dont want sex sinxe he is asking another woman for nude pictures it really saddens me to think we were so happy i thought i had a perfect relationship i had no idea what was going on behind my back and god knows what else i dont have any trust anymore he blocks me from thimgs which if he aphas nothing to hide he wouldnt have to block me ! Iam really at a loss i know what i hqve to do i reall can see this marriage lasting since he has so much interest apparently in other woman plus he is adsicted to his presxription medicne and takes my muscle relaxers after his runs out leavin me with none hiw selfish and. Hqve told him that !well enough with me i hope you can firure out wha you want if tou dont feel it in your heart get outnow ! Take care !and good luck !

 
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